Rundown (6/14-6/17) E3 2017: The Psycho Wars Shall Return

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Well, the week has passed and E3 2017 has ended, and before I know it, it will be E3 2018 and I will be doing this whole shebang all over again, except then I will be further along in my transition and be far more pretty. Normally not much news comes outside of the press conferences, but there were enough stories to justify a traditional rundown, so I’ll just get started. (more…)

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Rundown 3/20-3/26 Fapsturbate 3: Master Class

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0 Dont fap you by GashiGashiWell, nothing much happened this week, so I wrote up a little thing about my own weird views of sexuality that probably lacks the insight that I should have developed at this point, but that will probably not happen until I start visiting a head doctor who can lobotomized my noggin and go all Milda7 on my ass. Goodness, I just referenced a sissification artist, didn’t I?  Whatever. It’s another week, so another rundown will ensue! (more…)

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Rundown (10/11-10/17) Feces Makes the Heart Go Yonder

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Press Switch you are a poopy face doo doo head dumb dumb steamy boily feces shit fuck you suckSo, the Trans-Pacific Publishing trade agreement is a big thing this week, and it may affect all media in Japan, Australia, the United States, Canada, and more. It will increase the already overpowered corporations’ power, is vaguely written, and will exacerbate the problems with copyright laws, laws that have been mangled and mutilated over the past few decades. You could be deemed a criminal for having the audacity to leak information that the public ought to know about, even if it’s something as simple as a game being technically broken upon release. Tampering with software files would be illegal, from removing DRM, to fixing games, and potentially even mods, which would be viewed as hacking. Piracy could be met with the destruction of your hardware and neigh unlimited fines, and this whole thing was written by corporations for it, so why in the fuck would any true human being support that shit? Seriously, the fact this democratic government would so much as consider this sort of putrid pulsating piece of poo for a second is disgusting. (more…)

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Rundown (7/26-8/01) Set Gamindustri on Fire and Beat Off on the Flames

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0 Jojo CEO paul marketting badnes oh dear gameinustri is on fire fuck the policeI know that it would be really hard, and the framerate would constantly plummet to 20 fps if one is lucky, but I really want to see a game where you can destroy all the buildings in it. Sure, there was Red Faction Guerrilla, but I want something like that set in a big modern city, as I get bored seeing the same darn sights when commuting every week and want there to be a game where you can cause collateral damage to millions and cost the city trillions as you destroy national monuments for the lolz. Instead the closest thing to what I want is No Man’s Sky, but I’m pretty sure the space cops will kill you if you try to dig a hole through the other side of the planet just to see how the game handles this. (more…)

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Rundown (1/11-1/17) Let Nintendo’s Train Penetrate Your Butthole, Dummy!

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Gaf HypeI honestly forgot about this post until the last minute, and did not prepare any sort of pseudo-witty banter. As such, I am just going to jump into this week’s Nigmabox Rundown, which I have titled “Let Nintendo’s Train Penetrate Your Butthole, Dummy!” I’m glad that I’ve been doing this for about two years now… (more…)

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Rundown (11/16-11/22) Pokemon is Basically a Nightmare Furnace

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gengar_junji_ito.0.0_cinema_960.0So, on the day after my twentieth birthday I was told that the company I work for as an office boy wants me to fill in some big shoes over my winter break from school. Meaning that instead of learning how to use Ren’py as I had planned while working on the Vivian James X Girl In My Dreams story, I will be making some money to afford that MSI GTX 970 Graphics card I’ve been eying for a while. Along with 16GB of RAM and maybe a new monitor… I’ve wanted that stuff for months, okay? (more…)

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Rundown (6/09-6/10) E3 2014: Goodbye Despair, Hello Eighth Generation(?)

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Fuck E3

It is rather pointless for a little slice of nowhere blog with only a small number of views to do a summarization of the E3 press events, especially when they were not watching them live due to real life events, such as work. But I got home to catch the latter two, and catch up with the former before Nintendo did their event and managed to get everything done before Tuesday’s end… well after everybody and their brother did their own version of this, and often far better than my assorted ramblings that are made all the dumber by the insertion of anime screencaps. It’s Nigmabox’s third annual Super E3 Rundown!

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Rundown (5/04-5/10) The Evils of 100+ Hour Games Are Pure and Vile

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KLK Mom Please Stop me from being evil and bad parents control your kids they are wild jojo cosplayersAs of writing this, I am over 30 hours into Persona 4: The Golden Boys, which is an 80-90 hours JRPG made for another 50 hours playthrough, and maybe a 40 hour one following that. I really do wish I decided to play it on very easy, as I would be able to spend a fifth as much time in the dungeons, which I spent 5-7 hours in during one session as it is the most effective means of gaining levels and not needing to worry about the combat. Yet, going into the combat after messing around with social links and high school shenanigans feels like it is from a completely different game. I’m still enjoying it though. (more…)

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Rundown (1/12-1/18) Monkeys Are in Business of the Busyness

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CDI Carrying Random Gorilla of JoySo, I just barely have enough for a post this week, as it is the middle of January and people are still getting back into the swing of things after a holiday break. I do not have enough time to come up with a creative intro, as I’ve been trying to plow through the insanely large Assassin’s Creed IV. 27 hours in and I’m 39% done. I like myself a fine long game, but this is utterly nutterly buttery, Ubisoft. Other than that… screw it, wait for my review of that after Just Cause 2 and Marlow Briggs.

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Rundown (11/10-11/16) I’m Getting Old, But Not Really

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ButtholesTomorrow, assuming this is being read on the seventeenth, is my Birthday! Meaning that I’m going to be nineteen… okay! Yes, I’ve finally reached the point where my age going up means little to nothing, as there are no major benefits that I can receive until I am a bitter old man who throws bread crumbs at children because he’s bored and it was a Thursday. Yep, college, job, house, and then I’m basically done for life, with this blog being the best thing I’ve ever done with it… along with a couple crappy ebooks nobody will read. After all, the odds of me getting married are like finding a shiny Pokemon in a speed run. That, and being in a room filled with children just the other day and being annoyed at their appearance sums up my thoughts on them pretty well. (more…)

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Rundown (10/20-11/02) Sorry, I’ve Been… Look At The Bunnies

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Bloomed Into Action AKA Yo Pussy

Yep, another double decker! Meaning there are untouched paragraphs from the twenty-second and a length that is a bit longer than I would like. With my image storage certainly dwindling, although I do occasionally find gems like the header. It actually makes me really upset at how CrunchyRoll is handling their manga service, as it is both limited in terms of library and requires a subscription to view pages available on the internet. I mean, really? Limited to only the newest chapter for series that have been going on for volumes? I’ll stick with hunting for delightfully insane stuff while procrastinating for my School Days review. Because goldarn is that show boring!

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Rayman Legends Review

Legends MainNote: I re-reviewed this game in 2017. Please disregard this original review.

So after years of working on and developing a franchise, you tell its creator to more or less reboot it, while trying to make it flop as hard as possible. What with your terrible timing for its release, where it’s first week sales in five digits was not surprising. Oh, but by the end of the year the game managed to make money because it was made by a small team. So you plan a bigger and better sequel, only to tell the creators to spend another six months on it before finally releasing it in a manner to maximize profit by putting it on everything. Is it good? Yes. How good is it? Let’s find out. Ready, one, two, three go!

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Rundown (8/18-8/24) Gamescom’s Stealthy Groin Gripper

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Forgot This shipDid I ever have any idea what I was going to do with this? I just sorta started recapping big game news after I wanted to have something other than reviews. But now, I just sorta kept on doing this one weird thing that nobody in their right mind would use as the definitive news listing. Oh well, not gonna stop. As this only takes effort when I rummage through for the most fitting images I can be arsed to find. (more…)

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Rundown (7/14-7/27) Ketchup On Some Clams!

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Monkey BoobsOkay, it’s been two weeks, but I have the excuse of news being slim, yet there was enough for a good hearty rundown of the past two weeks, and the thingamajigs that happened over the latter half of July, so let’s just get this over with. Put a monkey in some 16-year-old tits, gosh darn it!

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Rundown (6/14-6/19) A Microsoft and Nintendo Pie Soiled by Time!

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Microfunk dawgie dawgWell Microsoft, now I’ve got to publish something where I got annoyed at your bullcrap. Oh no, I’ve got some words to say about their change in tone, but I’m not going to invalidate three paragraphs! I wanted a smooth week after E3, but nope! Here is what I wrote, thrown out to the dogs as it is already rotting.

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Rundown of E3 2013: Days 3 and 4 – Some Seeds Before The Drought, Sir?

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Okay, most of the big news was thrown off in the first day, then the second day, and come the third and fourth days, there really was just over a page worth of stuff I felt like writing about, because it was just more in depth looks at the games announced on the first day. With most of my thoughts, like Yoshi’s New Island looking like hogwash even in 3D and A Link Between Worlds having the worst Link model in the series, staying the same.

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Rundown (5/19-5/25) The Xbox One… Again!

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xbox_one_625friendly-590x330Well, this week in the Videospiele was dominated by a single entity, their name Microsoft, or Micro$oft, Micro$hit, or, the one I made, Microsense. And even though I already gave my thoughts on the reveal, the world is set on this Xbone thingie, so I’ll be going on a massive tirade after the more contemporary going ons. (more…)

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Rundown (5/12-5/18) Are You Ready For the Summer? I’m Not!

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Summer Fun Time of AnalAre you ready for the summer? I’m not! Mostly due to how it means I’ll be done with high school, and can’t fart about as much because of internships and college classes. Remember one thing I’ll tell you kids, live free and wild, eating all he gummies, and playing all the video games. Then I guess OD before you go to the real world… Do you remember all the friendship I brought into your life- okay, now to fulfill my obligations.

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Rundown (4/28-5/04) I’m Allergic to Your Very Soul Vidja Glums!

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KS I am Sick NRI spent a while thinking if I should bring up the Dragon’s Crown Kerfuffle, and it seems like an alright opener. If this was done solely to get more media attention to Dragon’s Crown, good job Vanillaware. Now if only they would take it to the true extremes, which would probably just be levitating spheres bigger than watermelons that do most of the battling. Either way I want to buy the game solely for the overly exaggerated and sorta gross in a good way character designs. Just need to get that Vita.

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Rundown: Nintendo Direct (4/17)

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251877-yikes

Well, numerous sites have offered their fast paced summaries of the most recent Nintendo Direct, but I’ve never taken “your opinion isn’t needed” as a valid reason not to talk about something, unless the opinion itself was lame on a personal level. So taking the amount of concentrated happy Nintendo injects into my eye sockets, time to be a snarky badger about it. Also not include hyperlinks beyond Destructoid’s Round-up.

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Rundown (4/07-4/13) The Biggest Stick to Go Into a Girl’s Bum

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NRHEADER

Let’s make this a dozen and keep this doom train roaring through the great plains of Acirema, the lands of the deities’ kin, and their devoured corpses. Falling from the sky for weeks before landing and altering the land with the fertile moist soil! Let’s make a cake to celebrate the- What am I talking about? I’ve got game news for this rag of an industry.

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NWS (2/17-2/23) Destined Demo Drops Dumbing Dogs Documented by Cheap Seasonal indies

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  • Reading time:12 mins read
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NWS 4For the week of 17/2/13-23/2/13.  Another week, another one of these things, and some more pictures. With it being divided into two parts, to make me regret calling this a weekly segment. I already talked about the Playstation 4 Announcement Conference and why I am bitter towards it. But I still have a good two pages of other crap!
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NWS (2/03-2/09) Racist Residents, Awakened All-Stars, Lackluster Legends, and Impossible Inquiries

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NSW Header

Let’s see how things went last week… no reaction, lovely! Not that it matters to me, because I just like writing, but hopefully if I keep doing something, I can at least get a fish. Because there is truly not a more noble weapon.
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