Rundown (10/11-10/17) Feces Makes the Heart Go Yonder

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Press Switch you are a poopy face doo doo head dumb dumb steamy boily feces shit fuck you suckSo, the Trans-Pacific Publishing trade agreement is a big thing this week, and it may affect all media in Japan, Australia, the United States, Canada, and more. It will increase the already overpowered corporations’ power, is vaguely written, and will exacerbate the problems with copyright laws, laws that have been mangled and mutilated over the past few decades. You could be deemed a criminal for having the audacity to leak information that the public ought to know about, even if it’s something as simple as a game being technically broken upon release. Tampering with software files would be illegal, from removing DRM, to fixing games, and potentially even mods, which would be viewed as hacking. Piracy could be met with the destruction of your hardware and neigh unlimited fines, and this whole thing was written by corporations for it, so why in the fuck would any true human being support that shit? Seriously, the fact this democratic government would so much as consider this sort of putrid pulsating piece of poo for a second is disgusting.

Now that I took care of that, on with this week’s #FucKonami moment, as TPP can now mean two things in regards to gaming, with the former being far worse than the latter. In short, Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain made over 170 million in one day, which only helps to enhance how awful Konami’s practices around the game were, as even if the game cost 100 million, after expenses and taxes and such, it should have at least broken even. But they instead were fueled by their own corporate greed and almost ruined what could have been a truly mind blowingly good game. Oh, and to bring up a dead horse, #FucKonami for that awful Little King’s Story butchering on the Vita. A sin that shall be forgotten as the original Wii title, which I adored oh so much, will be getting a PC port provided by XSEED in 2016. Along with Senran Kagura: Shinovi Versus, a Vita hack and slash where tits are life and ass is hometown, plus Xanadu Next, a 2005 PC action title from Falcom that people have known about since the beginning of 2015. 1 Kill Time Aww that is so cute adorable do it again smile heart

About two months ago, I mentioned how a new A Boy And His Blob was in the works, but I would have preferred an HD rerelease of the WayForward Wii title. Well, that’s exactly what I’m getting. The announcement was leaked through a ratings board, as it often is, and the game will be for PC, PS4, XBO, and Vita, not the Wii U because… why waste the money, I guess. What is likely coming to the Wii U, and probably the NX while we’re at it, is Twilight Princess HD, as spotted by those datamining dears who found it on the Nintendo’s servers with the HD moniker. Not that you will need to even buy a Wii U to play it, as some sexy people are making a Wii U emulator. The Xbox 360 emulator barely can boot up more than a handful of games, but a Wii U emulator can boot up Wind Waker HD no problem. 2 PL What the hell are you doing wtf explain seriously what was that huh

I’m sure the emulator will be fully functional around the time the NX rears its head, which may be sooner than I think, but I doubt those rumors about a summer 2016 release are true. Nintendo has just recently distributed software kits, causing companies like Monolith Soft to send out mass recruitment requests. Launch support was a big problem for the 3DS, and hurt the Wii U immensely, so I really hope they say the system will be out in Q1 2017 at the earliest. Oh, and now the bees are buzzing about how the NX contains some Industry Leading Chips, which I raise my brow at. Honestly, I am a little annoyed that people can’t just wait to learn about a product they want to buy. In Q1 2016, we will get a nice reveal of information, and can then wait because that’s something adults can and often do, wait patiently for things to come out and enjoy them once they are in their hands… Now here’s a screenshot from Persona 4 Golden of a demon on a toilet.3 P4G I'm a pooping demon on a toilet in teh BATHROOM! #fuckthisgayearth my ass if full of penguins

Remember Black Desert, that Korean free to play MMO with dazzling graphics? Well, the western version they announced will be a premium title, meaning no subscriptions, no microtransactions, just one flat fee and you get to play it forever. In my mind that means the game will be a little better, but I’m sure that the foulness inherent in the medium of the MMO will still find a way to stink up this pretty little thing. Although, microtransactions in general are a no-no in my book, which makes their introduction in a game the developer stated would not have them a tad troubling. The game is Payday 2, and also one of their leads insulted a fan for complaining about how a console version of Payday 2 is apparently broken months after launch… Note to self, avoid Overkill Studios for the foreseeable future, as they are liars and meanies.4 Bitter Change spray bottle bad meanie jerk punishment rude

Speaking of… okay, Square Enix is kind of a meanie for a lot of things, but they aren’t liars, not that I feel that great about how the company is considering crowdfunded localizations. I don’t like the idea of companies with money asking for money I know they have access to, but it is better than nothing, and I would rather see people splurge a million over Dragon Quest to prove Square Enix wrong. Speaking of crowdfunding, there is an asymmetrical eight player multiplayer Friday the 13th video game, now on Kickstarter, as that somehow does not warrant a publisher and the license is owned by the director of the original movie. But as if one of the most prolific names in… probably all of cinema, wasn’t enough, Adam Sessler is promoting it… even though I would rather have him do just about anything else where he’s on camera. …I miss Sessler’s Something and Address the Sess.5 KS Sad TIme Depression Upset

I also miss the glory days of Steam before all the garbage was added to the storefront on a daily basis. However, Valve is aware of Steam having problems, and is working on Valve’s lacking lackluster customer service. Comforting, but you have already done damage to your brand by associating your once prestigious web service with the likes of Digital Homicide, and god knows how many terrible, barely functional, half-finished, and quickly made games.6 DR this bullshit ducks ass I want out of this what are we going to do after thsi terrible thing

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