Rundown (3/30/2025) Game Fighter Animard is Dope!

This Week’s Topics:

Rundown Preamble Ramble:
Game Fighter Animard is Dope!

Starting off this week, friend of the site Chari has been translating old manga lost to time yet again, and delivered a pair of comics from the legendary Go Nagai (Devilman, Mazinger Z, Cutie Honey). The first of which, Change Sabu, will be the subject for April’s TSF Showcase. But today I want to talk about the other work they translated, Game Fighter Animard. A 1992 video game themed isekai about a prolific gamer, Jun, being isekai’d into a magical game where he and his friend, must save this digital world from a great demon king. Also, the protagonist turns into a blonde bombshell dressed in next to nothing but underwear and shoulder blades, a la Valis, Athena, Valkyrie no Boken, Popful Mail, etc.

Upon realizing this, I was a bit concerned about how genuine this would all feel. Nagai would have been in his late 40s when he wrote this comic, a bit beyond the target demographic of games of this era. However, he expresses an earnest fascination and respect for the trends, iconography, and tropes of video games of this era. To the point where I could easily believe this was written by someone 20 years younger.

Enemies drop gold, the costs of equipment are prohibitive, weapon upgrades can be completely game-changing, and the very structure of the comic is decidedly game-y. Starting in open wastelands where the only thing of note is a shop and roaming monsters, shifting into a variety of dark lairs and castles, before growing into something more outlandish and uncanny. The overall visual language is aligned with something that, at the very least, feels right given the popular western-style fantasy trends of early 90s Japanese video games. Though, this being a comic, it is able to get away with a lot more graphic material. Enemies getting dismembered into black bloody goop, people are tortured and left to rot, and of course Jun’s avatar would be a bit much for Sega or NEC, let alone Nintendo, of the era.

Also, before I forget, Animard is one of those weird manga that was actually written to be read left-to-right like western comics. This is not unheard of, but it is quite bizarre, especially for a work that never officially left its motherland. I don’t know why this is the case, and after reading so many comics over the years, it’s a bit jarring to read something that objectively is manga, but is read in the opposite format.

Starting the actual story, Jun gets sucked into the TV after gaming on a mysterious console sent to him in the mail and becomes the aforementioned busty blonde bombshell with the strength of a three ton truck. Following the logic of narrative convenience, Jun is a highly adept fighter and thrives in this world from moment one. Defeating random mobs, getting some gold, and even fighting a boss when trying to haggle with a shopkeep character named… Battle. All before learning about the ultimate threat to this world, the Great Demon King Goldar (no, not that Goldar). Jun, being the typical hothead battle-hungry protagonist of the era, is psyched at the prospect of a new challenge, but he decides to get some help from a friend character, Yamada. He largely serves as a friend for Jun to vamp off of, and whereas Jun becomes a hot warrior lady, Yamada becomes a pig man with the combat skills of a… pig man. Part of me wants to say that he is a cute reference to something or other, but I think Nagai just felt like drawing a funny animal pig man.

After de-iskeai-ing and re-iseaki-ing, the two swiftly get captured by some midboss minions and get sent to Dracule. Who is, as the name implies, a Dracula, but this time he’s a giant monstrous humanoid with a mouth that merges with his ears. It’s one of the many rad-as-hell designs this comic boasts, and the ensuing fight scene really shows off Nagai’s mastery of the art of comics. The framing, the sense of motion, the way this monster grows more aggressive as Jun pushes him into a corner and fights back. The sense of scale, tension, and level of detail are all impressive, but they are also deliberately undercut with the interjection of comedy, having this diabolical monster be defeated when pig man Yamada barfs up a bunch of garlic onto his face. Thus leading to a farcical defeat as Jun stakes Dracule with a pillar, turning him into a goofy outline before he melts into ash.

Honestly, the story could pretty much end here as far as I’m concerned, already at a respectable 50 pages, but this is just the beginning. What follows next is the detailing of the lore behind these isekai adventures, though it boils down to this. In the late 21st century, humans identified a spirit world that they dubbed Anima. A collection of different worlds, all born from the imagination and feelings of humans. Those with strong imaginations became ‘programmers’ of these worlds, turning them into games that humans could enter. This is done via a device— in this case a weird Mega Drive— that allows someone to send their spirit into an Anima represented by the cartridge. Those who travel into Anima, known as Animards, assume the form of their ideal male or female facets— under Jungian psychology, their anima and animus. Meaning that Jun became a blonde hottie because that’s what he likes, while Yamada… was probably just a pig in his past life, or he’s a gay furry. Who’s to say! Maybe it’s both!

Now, why are they called Animards? Well, I asked Chari, who translated this manga, and they’re not entirely sure. I theorize that it might be a portmanteau of Anima and wizard, but that’s just a guess. I think this might be an instance where a Japanese creator misunderstood the arbitrary rules of English and made something that sounded cool, rather than something that was linguistically sound. It wouldn’t be the first time this happened, and it wasn’t the last.

The explanation is a bit clunky— don’t even get me started on how game consoles and games are being sent back in time to the early 90s— but it’s an idea that I really like. It presents games as being literal other worlds birthed from a collective fantasy by its creators. It has the players channel a facet of themselves and manifest it into the form they use to traverse through this spirit world. Which I think is far more interesting than just have someone be themselves while in a game. And with some tweaking, I think this could be the basis for a genre-bending adventure story that sees characters assume new forms, face new challenges, and so forth, as they venture into new worlds each chapter or arc.

That’s actually something pretty close to my heart. The concept of characters getting transplanted into a variety of genre spanning worlds, assuming different forms, meeting with new characters, and trying to solve problems before returning home. I tried doing it justice way back when I was 18 with Nari’s Logs, and I still think that this idea could make for something excellent if put in the right hands. While Nagai does not go as far with it as I would have liked, this is at least a solid proof of concept.

**Embrace the man/woman within, become plural in this digital spiritual reality!**

Following a diversion involving an ice knight, ice dragon, and an FTM Animard who sacrifices herself to save Jun— it’s dope, but not really essential to telling the story— the next leg of the adventure begins. A 120 page journey where the story really hits its stride and delivers some truly dazzling action and spectacle. Having defeated two bosses so far, Jun, Yamada, and Battle the Shopkeep all summon a cartoonish ~~pterodactyl~~ Pteranodon and venture through a warp zone to enter the domain of the aforementioned Great Demon King. I won’t go into too much detail on it— as I really just want people to read this comic for themselves— but there are a lot of things about this sequence that I just love. Like how the voyage to the Great Demon King’s domain basically takes the form of a vehicular shooting game. How the crew obtains power-ups by defeating flying minions, giving Jun a hyper detailed arm cannon and Pteranodon a pair of wing guns that Yamada and Battle aim so they can feel like they’re contributing.

It’s a blend of sci-fi and fantasy that was not uncommon in games of the era— just look at games like Hydlide III, Wonder Boy, Final Fantasy I, the first two Ultimas— and I just love it for how laissez-faire and playful it is. It mixes genres in accordance to the rule of cool, surprises the player, and builds up a sense of intrigue and wonder about what happened to this world. Though, here, it’s mostly an excuse for Nagai to blend together two concepts he likes to deliver something frequently awe-inspiring in its detail and beauty. I am not familiar with Go Nagai’s work, but this comic really shows off his excellence as both an artist and as a sequential storyteller. The level of detail and care put into some of these scenes is at times stunning. The way it blends high intensity action and cartoonish deformities is both gorgeous and inspired. There is a palpable sense of passion and energy in how the characters are drawn, in how much effort is put into crafting an appealing image. All for what ultimately amounts to a one-off idea, based heavily on popular trends at the time.

**I love every GOLDARN thing about this!**

I also really appreciates the game-y nods seen when the crew actually enters the castle. Going through a labyrinth that looks like something straight out of a hand-drawn guidebook. Learning that the boss is invincible without getting one last McGuffin and power boost. All before a multi-stage boss battle. Sure, none of these things are inherent to video games, but the inspirations are still clear, and quite appreciated.

After many trials and diversions, Jun naturally wins, and as a reward, he learns that Battle the Shopkeep is actually the creator of this world and, I guess, got stuck here in the role of a minor character after the Great Demon King gained sentience. …I have no clue how that’s supposed to work. How does the creator of a game get sent into it and how does a character just become sentient? But it does not really matter. It’s a final twist, helps make the protagonist out to appear as more of a hero… at least before he starts ranting about cleaning up the creator’s mess.

With the help of the Pteranodon— who, as an aside, is basically an in-universe taxi driver who was recruited to pilot a fighter jet to fight the god of evil— the protagonist eventually returns home. Except rather than returning to the world he knew before, Jun is now the heir to a million-dollar estate, son of the company president, lives in a mansion, and has a hot mom. Hell, even pig-boy Yamada managed to become a big shot, smoking cigars like a good 12-year-old, dressed dapper as shit.

They have everything they could want— or at least the money to buy anything they could want— and as far as I’m concerned, the comic could just end here and now. Except that’s not what happens. For their success, a copy of Super Robot Wars teleports directly into Jun’s hands, and he immediately decides to go on a new iskeai adventure. Which… bro. It has not even been five minutes. Just enjoy your wealth a little bit! Instead, they land squarely in a damn warzone and go through a far more… expedited journey. While the first story was about 200 pages, the second one is only about 60, indicating that there might have been diminishing interest or time available to work on this project. Also, while Jun and Yamada transformed when entering the fantasy world, in this near future world, they don’t transform. Why? Because they spend 85% of their time here in robots, and are effectively transforming into robots. It does not make lore sense, but lore sense does not make for an swift story!

Anyway, humanity is getting creamed by alien robots, so Jun and Yamada need to pilot SD Mazinger and… some generic robot without any weapons and barely useable arms. I’m not a mecha fan, so I do not recognize this design. Things are bad, they are seen as the last line of defense, and with no training, the two are shoved off into battle, where Jun is as capable as any ‘gifted’ hero. He bashes some baddies, saves a female pilot, controlling an SD version of Aphrodite from Mazinger Z, and before they can get much further, the trio find a giant enemy factory with… the most vulvic hole I have ever seen. Seriously, you have the labia majora, the clitoris, the whole shebang.

**Nagai *absolutely* knew what he was doing here!**

Eager for battle, the trio rush punch, slash, and boob missile their way into this facility, avoiding hazards before finally reaching the heart of the facility. A truly imposing, massive, enemy queen who cannot be defeated through direct means, necessitating some impulsive action from Jun to finally defeat her. Like all monsterous queens, she eventually blows up, turning the facility into an inferno in the process. The three try to escape, but Yamada gets trapped. Jun goes to rescue him, but ultimately perishes in the process. This is seen as a failure by the rules of Anima, even though they dealt a collosal blow to the enemy, and for their failure, they are punished. Rather than returning to their mansion, or original reality, they find themselves wearing rags, living in a house on the verge of collapse, and Jun’s mother is both unattractive and rude. However, they are given one other chance upon receiving a game with a samurai on the cover. This is their last opportunity to test their fortunes and skill, leading into a third part of the series that… seemingly never came to be. Nagai was a busy working man, and I guess this story just ends on a cliffhanger. How lame. Yet, a bad ending does not make for a bad story, and Game Fighter Animard is pretty dope taken as a whole.

The art and action alone make it an easy sell in my book, along with its well-timed bouts of comedy. But what really sticks out to me about it is how much reverence and affection it has for games of the era. It had a lot of opportunity to gloss over things, or not ‘get it’ like many works of the era, and the decade or two after its release, but it captures the spirit very effectively. Heck, it does it so well that I would say it overshadows the TSF element of Jun adopting a female body for the majority of the story. Yes, the series is technically TSF, but Jun stops really remarking on his blonde bombshell body after a few minutes. He does some fondling and looks frankly ridiculous with his nipple hook guards. However, he still largely acts like a guy throughout, and the story would be virtually the same if he were a male hero instead. Or if Jun were a hotheaded girl, instead of a hotheaded boy. There simply is not much to really look into here, and that’s coming from me!

So… yeah! Game Fighter Animard is pretty dope! It’s a good video game isekai story for its era, and while it’s TSF elements are limited, it’s a fun, thrilling, and beautiful read. I would highly recommend checking it out if anything I’ve said or shown strikes your fancy, and a big thank you to Chari for recovering this comic from the depths of untranslated obscurity.

Geoff Keighley Launches The Game Business
(Because Why Not At This Point?)

The goal of making a living writing about video games has always been fraught, but the past few years it has becoming an increasing pipe dream. Rampant layoffs, consolidation, AI slop has been deployed to take as many clickbait dollars as possible, and a search environment that is becoming increasingly hostile to new sites that aspire to offer quality… anything, really. As such, I think most games reporters are willing to take whatever job they can snag, let alone newcomers that don’t want to make video content. While writing is time-consuming, video production is drastically more time-consuming. Any new player entering this field would be appreciated, and Geoff “The SpikE3 Summer Game Awards Live” Keighley decided that he would fund a publication. Creatively entitled The Game Business.

Huh. Between Summer Games Fest, The Game Awards, and Gamescom Open Mic Live, three of the biggest gaming events of each year, it goes without question that Keighley has a lot of power in the industry. I would say he has far too much power, and that for as much as I dislike the ESA, I generally trust an organization over one rich man. A rich man who saw an opening when Spike was shutting down their video game awards show, saw an opportunity after E3 closed during COVID, and has promoted himself into being one of the biggest games person who has never made a game in his life. I’m not saying he didn’t put in work to get there— he was doing some genuine journalism back in the 2000s and even early 2010s. But it’s concerning when so many events are being driven by an individual, even if he may be more of a figurehead.

On one hand, I am glad to hear that he is paying games industry writers to do their own reporting and stories, but I also know that Keighley does not have much of a backbone. He relies on his connections a bit too much. He might pay lip service to things like layoffs of crunch, he won’t do more than that, as he is just trying to maximize his social capital. So while a publication under his thumb may claim to be impartial and not under his control… they are. That is how owners work. And anybody who does not believe this to be the case should look at Jeff Bezos’s The Washington Post. An growing rag of a publication that, despite its tagline, is anti-democracy and pro creating narratives that support a hierarchical system of billionaire elites and their debt slaves.

Anyway, The Game Business, despite being led by the former editor of GamesIndustry.biz, Christopher Dring, is more of a podcast oriented platform. With podcast here referring to lightly edited videos of two or more people talking, unscripted, about pressing issues, twice a week, along with a shorter article that addresses the key points and/or builds upon it. Which.…I guess is just modern web optimization. Publish the same basic content as audio, video, and text so that it reaches more people.

So far, only two shows have been published, and they’re pretty typical. Discussing how publishers are planning on delaying games and preparing for the release of Grand Theft Auto VI. But a few other morsels about how publishers are moving operation away from China in preparation of the Trump tariffs. The ESA launching a uniform approach to accessibility tags on game storefronts, which is very necessary. Every game has different accessibility needs, but this stuff needs to be standardized. While the second one is about how investors are shying away from AAA game development. Which is good, because AAA development has gone to shit in the past decade.

Still, good enough to add to the old RSS feed. …That I really need to move to a new platform.

Actually…

CALL TO ACTION!!!

Tell me what platform or software you all use to keep track of your RSS feeds. Because I am a Google Reader refugee who turned to Feedly, but now I want to get Feedly’s hands out of my dainty li’l pockets!

Also, I think I need a desktop email client. While StartMail works fine as a web app, the lack of an extension is ruffling my jimmies. I could try using Thunderbird, but I’m also in my open source arc and would be inclined to try out something like Roundcube or Snappymail.

Game Informer is BACK, BAY-BEE!
(Fuck You, GME! We Got That Crypto Money!)

HELL YEAH! Game Informer is BACK!

When Game Informer was shut down back in August 2024, everybody was completely shocked. Game Informer had been a 33-year-old institution, there was no indication that things were going bad, and it all seemed like a move made out of avarice by GameStop, their corporate owners, who wanted to minimize their expenses. The decision to shut down the website immediately was a hostile assault to the prospect of preservation, the closure abused the trust employees must have in their employers, and it was overall destructive to the broader gaming industry.

I have zero respect for GameStop after this, and am honestly rooting for their business to fail. Yes, that would be a blow to brick and mortar games retail, but it would result in a wild liquidation event where burgeoning entrepreneurs could buy up old gaming inventory and open up or stock up a retro game shop. Which, for the record, we need more of. I might think that the physical games market is going to fade away in about a decade, but retro gaming is not going away, and an influx of inventory would only help the market. (Also shout out to Retro Dimension on Touhy in Chicago. I sold my game collection to them two years back so I could buy a house.) Also, if GameStop were to go bankrupt, it would be soooo funny seeing those vile evangelists face the music as they realize Ryan Cohen is not going to make ’em Gorillionaires.

Akumako: “Natalie, not everybody reading this has watched that Dan Olson documentary four times. Focus, bitch.”

Righty, right. So Game Informer is back. Their website has been restored. The former staff is all back, they published a bunch of reviews, and their legacy as a website has been re-established. They just came back, so it will take time before they are moving at full steam again, and resume publishing their physical magazine. And this time, I am going to support Game Informer in this new incarnation— something I failed to do previously, as I thought they were too corporate. Which is why I’m glad that they followed suit with Second Wind and Easy Allies by being an independent venture, that may or may not have undisclosed private—

Akumako: “The newly formed Game Informer Inc is owned by Gunzilla Games.”

Wait, what?

Akumako: “Did you really think they would be able to buy the IP and assets from GameStop without an outside party?”

No, not really, but I hoped—

Akumako: “Gunzilla’s some game company pushing a battle royale extraction shooter with NFTs. Founder’s some fintech bro who made a dating app and decided to start up a game studio.”

You’re really not making this sound like a good revival, you know?

Akumako: “As a shooter, it looks fine, but the crypto bullshit makes the whole thing means the game’s going to be pay-to-win and/or play-to-earn.”

Oh grief…

Akumako: “The good news is that Gunzilla said that they won’t interfere with Game Informer’s operations, and will let their editors decide what content gets published. So, you know, ‘no outside influence.'”

…Here’s a thing about outside influence and new owners. Owners can change suddenly. Owners’ philosophies can change instantaneously. Just because the owners are cool now and want the editorial team to use their own judgment does not mean that the owners won’t ever come in and tell them to cut that shit out. Owners only own because they expect to get something out of their investment. Whether it be money (not likely in the games press), clout, reputation, or influence. I am not specifically targeting Gunzilla or its owners. They might be inclined to keep this institution alive out of the goodness of their heart and love of gaming. But maaaaannnnn is it harder than ever to believe that people with money and capital will be willing to treat workers like humans.

While I am not fond of this new ownership on principle, I am willing to believe that they are far less malicious than GameStop. Hopefully Game Informer Inc will be able to flourish under these terms, making them untouchable. In fact, I am so glad that this is a thing that I will be purchasing a one-year subscription to their physical magazine when it resumes publishing. Not because I am a physical media person. I actually find physical books to be difficult to read compared to an epub. But because reading but a basic blog and social feed on a phone sucks dog-asses, and I would like to read it while on my exercise bike. Oh, and help support the games press in my own way.

Akumako: “Couldn’t you just buy other game publications that are actually independent and talk about the sort of things you’re more invested in than modern AAA and Canon Indie Games?”

Canon indie games. That’s a good term for indie games that become culturally relevant and pass a vaguely defined threshold of relevance and renown. Way better than Triple-I. If someone was trying to sell you a Triple-I bond, you could kick them in the nuts and the cops wouldn’t even call that a party foul.

Akumako: “…Right. That does not answer my actual question.”

Uh… they’re really expensive? Back in my day, you got a whole magazine or comic subscription for like $20 to $30 a year, but now they’re charging that for a quarter. So I do not view them as worth it for something I will only read once. And as someone who got Game Informer for almost a decade as a kid, there’s some nostalgia value to that. Also, I don’t know what cheap independent gaming magazines are out there nowadays.

Akumako: “So… bad reasons?”

Yes’m. Skits aside, I am very happy that Game Informer is back, and hope that they flourish in this modern era. I hope that they find success, and are allowed to go on for… ever, basically.

Akumako: “Does that mean you’re gonna pay $10/month for an issue?”

…We’ll discuss this when the time comes, my demonic friend.

The FINAL Switch 1 Nintendo Direct
(Nina Tendo Works in Mysterious Ways…)

Sometimes I think Nina Tendo, the queen of Nintendo, just likes messing with people. She waited until January to announce the Switch 2, and offered nothing in terms of information in February. She eschewed the Biblically determined February Nintendo Direct that is cosigned by Holy Spirit of Satoru Iwata Himself. And she has granted people barely anything to look forward to for the rest of the year aside from Metroid Prime 4.1: The Beyonder and Pokémon Legends: Zed-II-Alpha. Hell, this Final Nintendo Switch Direct was announced right after the swansong port of Xenoblade X: The Definitive Edition (2025), so maybe that was the plan. Get out the last Wii U port before the Switch 2 and then talk about the rest of the year’s Switch 1 games? …Like the ports of Wind Waker and Twilight Princess HD? …Are we getting those yet? …What do you mean no? What about Metroid Prime 2 and 3? …No? F-Zero? Silksong? Ha. Of course not. Silksong isn’t real, and fans wouldn’t even like it that much.

…No joke, I wrote this segment before the Direct happened, and my cynicism was proven right! Anyhow, because of the scattershot nature of these announcements, I will be covering things in release date order, but first, I want to talk about Nintendo trying to control every aspects of their users’ lives. They want to control their music, their sleep schedule, and integrate themselves however possible. What’s the next logical step? Introducing IRL dailies. Nintendo Today! is a newsfeed app— not a website— that will serve as Nintendo’s next news delivery platform, promising to deliver something cute or news related every day, a la Smash Dojo.

Much like Nintendo Music, I hate the fact that this is an app, not a website, as I think that a website disguised as an app is a damn waste of time. Just make a website that people can properly link to and share with others on whatever platforms they use, do not force them to waltz into your walled garden. However, I do think that a daily trickle of updates is a great way to lure people in, build a sense of community, and help Nintendo influences spread the good word of their Chosen Christ. I understand wanting to ditch 𝕏, née Twitter, and looking at the gulags of Meta and Bluesky as kicking the can down the road.

However, people gather around platforms, and you gotta play the game and advertise on them if you want to attract an audience. Otherwise, your market share will shrink, your brand will become insular, and it will be harder for you to sell games. Hell, I would say that the fall of Twitter is one of the biggest reasons behind gaming’s general decline, as fewer people are using the platform, sharing clips, and allowing games to go viral. Unless widespread integration is brought back, then it will only get harder for people to share games and do their own marketing. This is a Nintendo L in my book, and so is their new approach to DRM.

I am not sure how family sharing has worked on Switch, as I have never had another game-liker in my family. (Excluding my soul sister, Cassie.) I checked out an article on how it works, and it sounds like a frustratingly arcane process that lacks the same ease of use as Valve’s Steam Family Sharing. You effectively had consoles under one account with ‘child’ consoles that have access to the same games. And only now, after the system has been around for eight-fucking-years, has Nintendo decided to change things up with the introduction of Virtual Game Cards.

Effectively, a Virtual Game Card allows users to, locally, lend copies of games to members of their Nintendo Switch Family Unit. Family members can only lend one game to each person at a time, can only lend one copy of each digital game, and cannot play a game while it is being lent. After two weeks, the loan will be revoked, software will be locked, and the software will need to be re-lent to be played again. It is a highly limited feature that only appeals to friend groups and families, and one that exists to confuse people into thinking they have digital ownership, when they do not. All of these loans require an internet connection, and they don’t even want you transferring software between two systems you own.

You see, if one has two Switches— no more than that— they now need to transfer their library as Virtual Game Cards, but these are not subject to the same 14 day lending limitation. However, you still need to connect to the internet and pass a check to transfer files to a new device.

This is why people want to dump your games and play them on a Steam Deck… And they are correct to do so.

Before moving on though, a few things I want to make note of but don’t have too many thoughts on.

Marvel Cosmic Invasion is the latest example of a retro-style beat ’em up for whatever IP is willing to pay, after games like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder’s Revenge were massive multiplayer successes that cost peanuts to develop. I first noticed this trend with Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: Rita’s Rewind, and I have a feeling this will keep on happening. Though, part of me has to ask why they are making fully new games like this, rather than bring back classic beat ’em ups. Like that Konami X-Men arcade game. It’s a classic, and would have synergized great with that X-Men ’97 series. But nooooo.

Dragon Quest I and Dragon Quest II HD-2D Remake shared a trailer, and it looks to be an extension of Dragon Quest III’s remake, which people generally loved as far as I can tell. However, I still think that going backwards to DQ I will be jarring, as it lacks the class or party system from III, and is a far simpler game, as it was the first major console RPG. Dragon Quest II would be less so, but they are determined to make changes to that one, by adding a new playable character. …Then is this a true remake of Dragon Quest II if you are going to change the story and party dynamic so much? Because DQ II was made for three party members. I played it, and I really did not think it needed a new girl like this is some Atlus re-release. Don’t misrepresent what these games were. Make them better, sure, but hold true to their ethos. Otherwise… just make a new Dragon Quest game, ya dorks. It’s almost been a decade since a traditional non-spin-off, and DQ XII is going to shift things up.

Metroid Prime 4: Beyond got a second trailer, and it looks pretty much like what I would expect from a new Metroid Prime. The environments are lushly detailed and gorgeous, maintaining visuals comparable to the excellent remaster of the original Metroid Prime (2002). Scanning is still a focus of the gameplay, naturally. The game follows the standard Metroid formula of Samus being on a new world where she has access to new powers. This time, it’s psychic powers.

The trailer does a shit job outlining these powers though. Starting by highlighting how she can “operate mechanisms” and “unlock doors”. But then it shows her slowing down time as she manipulates her beam blasts to fly through enemies and objects in pseudo bullet time. Just like in Singularity (2010)! Clearly, there are things still left to be revealed, and just looking at the raw gameplay shown… it looks like it has every right to be as good as any of the past Metroid Prime games. Which is what people want. What they have wanted for eight years! Metroid Prime 4 looks good, and is still looking at a 2025 release date.

Pokémon Legends: Z-A got another showing, but little about it changed my opinion of the game. I still think the game looks kinda rough, the lack of modeled windows makes it look half-assed, and that damn building jumping animation is still the worst jump animation I’ve ever seen. Which is strange, as some environments are quite detailed, some animations are fluid, particularly the idle animations of Pokémon throughout the city.

Though, the big takeaway from this trailer was the Z-A Royale, a night-based battle tournament where trainers go into wild zones and battle each other to ascend from rank Z to A, the A-rank winner allegedly receiving a wish. A simple, if genetic, concept, and one that leads to a lot of real-time trainer battles, meaning the game meets the battle quota that Pokédorks complained was missing from Legends Arceus. To reiterate, I’m expecting it to be something of a mess, while hoping for the best.

Also, I don’t know what Project:;COLD case.mirage is supposed to be, but it looks like absolutely my kind of shit. Too bad it is Japan only and has such an SEO hostile title.

Re-Release The Whole Saga of SaGa!
(SaGa Frontier 2 Remastered Shadow Dropped)

I swear, someone at Nintendo is just the biggest SaGa mark. SaGa Scarlet Grace: Ambition (2018), SaGa Frontier Remastered (2021), Collection of SaGa: Final Fantasy Legend (2021), Romancing SaGa: Minstrel Song Remastered (2022), SaGa: Emerald Beyond (2024), and Romancing SaGa 2: Revenge of the Seven (2024). All of these games and re-whatevers were announced at Nintendo Directs. Which is weird! It associates SaGa with Nintendo in a way that few other fully third-party series are. Hell, I would argue that a SaGa or Mana announcement should be added to any Nintendo Direct bingo card. Same with a Story of Seasons game announcement.

Anyway, this Nintendo Direct was home to an announced remaster of SaGa Frontier 2 (1999). …Which, weirdly enough, visually resembles Legend of Mana (1999) far more than it does SaGa Frontier (1997). Sprites with cartoonish proportions and PS1 levels of detail, illustrated backgrounds that have been filtered by an AI image processor, but look pretty good. And structurally, it’s about as weird as Legend of Mana, because it’s a SaGa game, and their motto is innovate no matter what.

It is a generations-spanning narrative where the player can hop around to accumulate knowledge— including with some brand new events not included in the original. And rather than just have one battle system, there are three. …This series is really made by insane people? And the game also has parameter inheritance, where the player can distribute stats across characters. Not equipment, but stats, kind of like functioning from Final Fantasy VIII (1999)? Oh, and for the remaster, they added native support for the PocketStation features from the Japanese version of the original, along with New Game Plus and new endgame battles, because why not.

Like always, I do not fully understand the SaGa series, its ethos, or what the crazy people making it are doing, but goldarn am I glad it’s around and kicking. SaGa Frontier 2 Remastered was released for PS4, PS5, Switch, PC, iOS, and Android on March 27, 2025.

Monument Valley Trilogy is Coming to Switch
(They Are Now REAL Games!)

I genuinely believe that all the noteworthy ‘golden age’ mobile games would have garnered a place in the core gaming canon if they were also released on PC and/or console at the time. The difference between them was largely the aspect ratio and form-factor, maybe the input device required. And the games shared many of the same ethos that made them successes. However, art lost the mobile game wars, for they had to compete with free-to-play games driven by vice, routine, and monetization. It’s genuinely sad how capitalism ruined what could have been a new frontier for gaming, and it was so successful, it has infected the very heart of gaming, relegating the real games to a small fraction of the industry.

Monument Valley (2014) was at the tail-end of this golden era, before smartphones became a necessity of daily life. And while I have never paid it too much mind, it has always been a game that I always respected out of principle, offering a stimulating puzzle game experience with gorgeous visuals and a deeply calming soundscape. It was a classy game for everybody, of all ages, and something that warranted the status of a cult classic. It did well, and got a sequel, but the mobile market is so hostile to paid experiences that last year’s third installment, Monument Valley III, was released as a Netflix exclusive in 2024.

I thought it was great that Monument Valley I and II were ported to PC in 2022, but that was well after their point of broader relevance, and when they were too new to be retro. They just seemed like any other aesthetically rich indie game hitting a cluttered market. And while I am glad that this version is also being brought to Switch, I also feel that it is too late for it to attain an elusive state of relevance. Allow me to explain.

Over the past two years, there has been this bothersome yet persistent narrative that the Switch is done, cooked, ready to be thrown into the trash with all of the old tech and old games in order to engage with The New Hotness. The important things happened, and what we are in now is an elaborate wrap-up after-party. The indie games of the first three years of the Switch’s life are The Indie Games for the Nintendo Switch, because they were out before the online storefront became cluttered, useless, and polluted. They are part of the Nintendo Switch Canon. They are Nintendo Switch Games. But 99% of modern games released on Nintendo Switch, beyond Nintendo-Branded Nintendo games, are not Nintendo Switch Games. Not anymore. Because the Switch version is no longer special, but a compromise, and its key feature of portability both lacks the novelty it once had and is no longer an exclusive trait. Thanks Valve.

This sense of ‘cool, but where was this game five years ago when I wanted it’ is something that I feel echoed in the realm of Nintendorks, who have been sitting over the Switch’s grave for so many years. Yet, this Direct has shown that not only is Nintendo still eager to support the Switch, but its twilight years are far longer than one expected. It’s like watching people gas themselves up for how their grandfather is gonna die at 60— because they are a genetically troubled family with a natural short life-span. Yet now it’s looking like gramps is gonna live to be spry in his 90s. Part of that could be attributed to shifts in lifespans, but it has less narrative satisfaction, because it is not following the accepted narrative arc of a rise and a fall. This is just a natural, drawn out, decline.

It really makes me wonder how people will view these years in retrospect. Because the Switch has been a great little tablet, but I also deal with incompetent software enough on the daily that I sympathize with the power-lust. So, will people keep on harping on it being weak, groaning on about how ‘gramps just didn’t fucking die and I wanted to get his fortune so I could buy a 9-inch dick with wheels ‘n’ shit.’ Or will people view it with the same retroactive love and fondness that the 3DS fandom has been repping since homebrew made major strides in the past 3-ish years?

…Sorry, what section was this again?

Akumako: “Monument Valley I and II are gonna hit PS4, PS5, Xbox One, Xbox Series, Switch, and PC via Steam on April 15th. Monument Valley III is gonna hit PS4, PS5, Xbox One, Xbox Series, Switch, and PC via Steam this summer. …Why not release ’em as a big Monument Valley: The Trilogy for $25 or $30?”

Raidou Remastered: The Mystery of the Soulless Army Announced
(And it Is a Damn Remake!)

Wa-hoo~! After being leaked a while back, we finally have the fabled Raidou Kuzonoha remaster, and I think that this warrants one of my ‘gaming history diatribes’ to fully understand. Back in Atlus’s experimental ‘do whatever we can and hope the money comes in’ era, they were just cranking out games like mad, and I am still impressed at how much they put out for the PS2 in just five years. They invested a ton of money in Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne (2003), and were determined to build upon their niche fandom. Digital Devil Saga (2004), Digital Devil Saga 2 (2005), Devil Summoner: Raidou Kuzunoha vs. The Soulless Army (2006), Persona 3 (2006), Persona 3 FES (2007), Persona 4 (2008), and finally Devil Summoner 2: Raidou Kuzunoha vs. King Abaddon (2008), which came with the third edition of Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne, Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne Maniax Chronicle Edition (2008).

And that was JUST their PS2 releases. Not even counting the DS, PSP, Wii, and phone games they were pumping out at the time.

All of these games have their own histories to them, but I still cannot get over the title for the Raidou Kuzunoha games, and the weird need to slap the Devil Summoner name onto them. Especially when they play wildly differently from the ones released at the time. The Japan and fan translation exclusive Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Summoner (1995) and the successor, Devil Summoner: Soul Hackers (1997), were both very traditional SMT games. First-person, demon recruiting, party building dungeon crawls that had detailed stories, immaculate vibes, and a light futuristic aesthetic. Good games I have never played, but would bug out if they were ever released a good collection. (Gosh, just release the Shin Megami Tensei: The Vintage Collection, Atlus!)

Yet when they brought Devil Summoner back for PS2 and in 3D (kinda), they decided to make it a third-person real-time action RPG built out of the bones of Nocturne, set in 1931 Japan, staring the most 30-something looking high school boy detective. Raidou Motherfucking Kuzunoha XIV. It was such a weird mishmash of ideas. It tackled a time period that Japanese people do not like to talk about, as they were extremely fascistic and genocidal. Almost as much as Americans during [INSERT DATE HERE]. It featured pre-rendered backgrounds in a time where they were being seen as increasingly dated. While choosing to do what precious few RPGs were doing at the time and switch to a real-time combat system where the player doubled as a demon babysitter.

It is such an oddity among its series, and that’s what makes it so neat. Sadly, due to the typical Atlus USA small print run, general obscurity, and the fact that its sequel was a 2008 PS2 game, the duology did not attract too many fans. But it did attract some diehards, including some modern SMT fans did not get to experience Raidou until he was featuring in Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne HD Remaster. A subpar remaster at launch that I doubt was ever fixed officially, but was modded into something better.

This is probably not the first pick that anybody should have for a PS2 era remaster of an SMT game. I think Digital Devil Saga would actually fare better. It is a more direct RPG duology with a connected storyline, room for QoL improvements, an aesthetic that ages with grace, and kinda standard SMT gameplay. But somebody really wanted to bring back Raidou Motherfucking Kuzunoha XIV. So they remade the game.

…Yeah, you heard me right. I know this re-whatever is called Raidou Remastered: The Mystery of the Soulless Army. But that’s a fucking lie! This ain’t no remaster. This is RAIDOU REMAKE!

They took a game world that was full of pre-rendered 2D set pieces and made that shit fully 3D. And for others, they either did a damn good job gussing them up, or they just remade them from scratch. Hell, I am just comparing snippets of gameplay, but I can already tell that the battle system has some major differences. For one, it has a camera is no longer fixed. And for two, the game is a lot less menu-driven than before, choosing to give the player shortcuts for commands, a combo meter, break gauges for enemies, and what looks to be a series of new abilities for Raidou himself. I have never played Raidou (2006), but I think that he’s a man who could not jump, and Raidou (2025) sure can!

Sega. Paul Marketing. What the HELL are you doing with calling this game Raidou Remastered: The Mystery of the Soulless Army when it is not a remaster. Hell, I don’t even think the models are repurposed, as I know what PS2 models look like, and they don’t look like that. I’m also pretty sure the cutscenes are shot-for-shot remakes of the original, because the lighting and visual effects are completely different. Maybe they recycled some things, but I’d be impressed if they even had the original production files. …Which brings me into the biggest thing of note about this remake. They completely changed the color spectrum. Damn it Atlus, why do you keep doing this? You did it with Persona 3, and now you are doing it to Raidou Motherfucking Kuzunoha XIV!

Now, I lack any connection to Raidou— I had not seem more than a few minutes of the gameplay until I started writing this section. However, I am not the biggest fan of the original’s color palette. It is very desaturated, features a lot of murky browns and sepia yellows, and I think that it would just be hard to parse out the visual details without running some post-processing color filter. It definitely is a vibe, a sensation, and makes me feel something. But it’s mostly a sense of cold, isolated villainous mundanity. For example, I found a comparison shot between the Nintendo Direct trailer and a longplay and the changes are drastic. Some may find the original to be better, resembling an old photo with a faded filter over it, but I think the remake, while a bit weird with its color choices, ultimately looks better. And if you don’t think so… anybody who really cares about the original PS2 game either still owns a PS2 or knows how to find PS2 ROMs. Though, as always, including a ROM of the original would have been appreciated.

Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Summoner Raidou Kuzunoha – The Mystery of the Soulless Army R.E.M.A.K.E. will be released for PS4, PS5, Xbox Series, Switch, and PC via Steam on June 19, 2025. I was initially surprised to see it was only the first game, but seeing as how it is a remake, I understand.

Patapon 1+2 Replay Announced
(Patapon Is BACK… On A Nintendo Console?)

When thinking back on the PSP, some people think about western handheld side diversions like the Grand Theft Auto, God of War, or Sony published 3D platformers played alongside PS1 and maybe Super Nintendo games. However, I remember the system for being ‘the PS2 part 2’ when it came to fun, creative, and unique Japanese games. There were dozens of great RPGs, just as many visual novels, but there was also some plain old weird yet creatively invigorating stuff that would have garnered some acclaim… if it were released in HD and on a ‘real console.’ Because back in the 2000s, console enthusiasts liked handhelds, while viewing them as an objective lesser. Insert your own racial comparison here.

And damn does Patapon fit the bill for a PSP-ass PSP game. I never played it, as I never had a PSP, but the chants of the little critters, their simplistic yet iconic design, and the fact that my friend liked the game, all embedded it into my mind. Yet, like so many games, it was stuck on the PSP, when something with as crisp and as clean of a visual style like this really warranted being on HD consoles. …Which is probably why they put it out on PS4 in 2017, along with Patapon 2 in 2020. …Before just porting over Patapon 3 in 2025 via their retro game PlayStation Plus service that I cannot be arsed to remember the correct name for.

I somehow completely forgot that these releases happened— except for the Patapon 3 one, as that was a month ago— and I think the reason is simple. Because Patapon is ultimately a casual rhythm strategy game, and that genre does not necessarily endear itself to being a home console exclusive. Especially in an era where Sony was pushing away from their playful Japanese lineage and settling on being the cinematic game publisher.

With that in mind, I was thrilled and surprised to see Bandai Namco announce Patapon 1+2 Replay for Switch, PC, and PS5. After Freedom Wars Remastered, MLB The Show, and Lego Horizon Adventure (2024), were all multi-platform, I guess I should not be too surprised to see Sony loan out their IP to a partner to put them out and make some royalties. After all, pretty much everyone who worked on those games has left, and the IPs are both niche and dormant. So they may as well let Bandai Namco put them out, Which really begs the question of what’s next in this port pipeline. I know I would love to see LocoRoco 1+2 come to Switch— because it would feel right. And while there is only a 2.4% chance of it ever happening, I would lose my marbles if they put out all three Parappa games on a Nintendo platform.

Akumako: “You already lost your marbles, Natalie! You had 8 big yogurt containers full of them, and then you lost ’em!”

That I did, my friend. That I did. I also lost my gems from Colorado.

Akumako: “Those were cheap imitation stones, not gems, ya dork. But your family geode was real.”

So… two questions about this specific release. Why only the first two and not all three games? Well, like I said, Sony never remastered the third one. They just put out the game as a PSP ROM. And I doubt Bandai Namco wanted to go to the trouble of remastering a whole new game. They could have tried looking for some of the original staff. For the record, Patapon was a joint venture between Japan Studios and Pyramid, who worked on Dragon Ball Z: Budokai 2 (2003) and El Shaddai: Ascension of the Metatron (2011). But that would be more work, and finding the source code and assets would probably be a chore. So they are just releasing the first two, which probably also sold the best, as Patapon 3 was a 2011 PSP game.

Second question: Why do a Patapon re-release now? Well, the lead creator of Patapon, Hiroyuki Kotani, is working on a spiritual successor, Ratatan. The Kickstarter for which met its goal by a factor of 10, making roughly $1.5 million, and is currently slated for a 2025 release date. So, there is a certain synergy to a re-release, even though I’d imagine that nobody told the Ratatan developers about this.

Overall, a strange little situation, but one that I ultimately approve, as games like this should be on as many platforms as possible. Patapon 1+2 Replay releases for Switch, PS5, and PC on July 11, 2025.

AI: The Somnium Files 3 – No Sleep For Kaname Date Announced
(A Sequel To One Of My Favorite Games Ever!)

…Hold on, what? WHAT?! Oh HELL YES!

AI: The Somnium Files (2019) is one of my favorite games of all time. The mystery, the comedy, the winding plot, the loveable bunch of characters, the truly excellent English dub and translation, and the subject matter all make it a title that not only lived up to every expectation I could have had, but exceeded it. I did not do a great job of reviewing it back in 2020, but it is a game that resonates strongly with me for reasons I cannot explain without risking big spoilers. Meanwhile, it’s sequel, AI: The Somnium Files – nirvanA Initiative (2022) is another banger title, albeit one I have more issues with and whose big twist is more boggling than it was enthralling. However, it still delivered on an enthralling narrative, built upon the original in a respectable yet creative way, and showed that the creative juices were still gushing over at Spike Chunsoft.

It has been three years since then, so… I guess it is time for another game in the series. I just was not expecting it. Not because the other two games did poorly. They did pretty well as far as I can tell. But I know series lead, Kotaro Uchikoshi, has been busy with Too Kyo games projects like Tribe Nine and The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy. However, a project like a video game is far more than one person, and with Uchikoshi acting in a supporting role, the sub-director from Nirana Initiative, Kazuya Yamada, is taking the writer and directorial reigns here. Fair enough. That is how you help talent grow and pass on skills to the next generation. So, what exactly is the plot of No Sleep for Kaname Date?

Well, I would have imagined this game being a sequel set after Nirvana Initiative, but instead, it’s an interquel. One set “a day after The New Cyclops Serial Killings was resolved,” and after internet idol Iris ‘A-Set’ Sagan was abducted by a UFO. Special Agent, and protagonist of the first game, Kaname Date, must search for where she was taken to, acting as her hero yet again. While Iris must navigate a ‘spaceship’, solving puzzles as she escapes from room to room, searching for the mastermind and a way to escape her deadly fate. Meaning we not only have a dual protagonist structure— a visual novel staple that ought to be used way more than it is— but we have escape rooms IN SPACE.

So far, that premise alone gets a big thumbs-up from me. …Except, the epilogue to AITSF was set three months after the Cyclops Serial Killings, and during those three months, this story simply cannot work. It could work the day immediately after that, but that would be a weird pull, and raise a lot of continuity questions. Could it work in the context of the broader story? Sure. But interquels like this are typically a bad idea, as they need to achieve relatively nothing. You can’t have the terrorists launch nukes, you can’t have aliens invade and become integrated as part of society, and you cannot reveal that beloved character was actually a dog in a people costume. Okay, maybe the last one could work, but you get my point.

I think something is up with this game, and there are three things that I want to point to. First, No Sleep For Kaname Date will cost $50 physical and $40 digital, as opposed to the $60 launch price for prior titles, indicating it is a smaller title, not a full installment. Second, the official title is No Sleep for Kaname Date From AI: The Somnium Files. That is a weird title that indicates something is up with the game, especially for a title that is so clearly appealing to existing fans, unlike Nirvana Initiative. Could it be a way to minimize the AI part of the title, as those who like creativity generally dislike AI? Maybe, but I doubt it. While my third point is that dataminers discovered a DLC menu for Nirvania Initiative shortly after its release, and I recall DLC being brought up in a Spike Chunsoft survey.

This brings me to my theory. That this is not The Somnium Files 3. That No Sleep For Kaname Date is an expanded version of what was originally envisioned as a DLC for Nirvana Initiative, but was expanded into a full game by a relatively small team at Spike Chunsoft while other people were shuffled onto other projects. …Like Dragon Ball Z: Sparking Zero or Shiren the Wanderer: The Mystery Dungeon of Serpentcoil Island. Furthermore, I believe that the big twist will be that this whole affair was all a story, dream, other fabrication, or exist as an expansion to one ending from the AI: The Somnium Files. Now, would I care if it turns out to be that? Probably not. I want a fun story, and with these games being full of bad endings, I’m more concerned about the endings being fulfilling.

Will the game live up to that fairly modest expectation? Well, I won’t need to wait too long to find out, as AI: The Somnium Files Gaiden- No Sleep For Kaname Date will be release for Switch and PC via Steam on July 25, 2025!

…Wait, why not on PS4 and Xbox One, like the last two games? I understand skipping Xbox, as Xbox users don’t buy games. But no PS4 or PS5 release? That is going to limit the market for this game, as there are some folks who just have a PlayStation. I doubt Sony would stop them from releasing the game on the console, because they don’t have standards, so why not release it, even if it’s a digital only affair?

Gradius Origins Announced
(All Praise to the REAL Shooting Games, Ya Schmucks!)

You know what I am not in any way good at? Shooting games! Also known as shoot ’em ups by wrong people, they are a simple yet artful creation that I have an immense amount of respect for, but are also a very localized fascination beyond a few freaks and weirdos. Still, I am glad whenever a publisher chooses to bring them back, and Konami is all about bringing things back, while throwing in an extra new game for good measure. They did it last year with Castlevania DominuS Collection (2024), and they are doing it again… with Gradius! Yes, Konami is bundling together the first batch of Gradius titles under the mantle of Gradius Origins, containing the following:

Gradius (1985)
Salamander (1986)
Life Force (1986), the American version of Salamander
Gradius II (1988)
Gradius III (1989)
Salamander 2 (1996)

However, because this is an M2 joint, this collection is aiming to feature the definitive arcade versions of every title, including early, mid, and late versions of the Japanese release, along with the North American versions for the applicable titles. All of which will be playable using M2’s custom emulation technology, complete with quality of life staples like rewind, easy mode, god mode, online rankings, galleries, and more. It is not a definitive collection of Gradius titles, and does not bother with the console versions of any titles, but this is still the type of thing that shooting game fans will love. …Especially because it also contains the brand new Salamander III!

Built from the ground up, looking like it could have been released on the PS1 or PSP, Salamander III is just an honest to goodness shooting game. One complete with co-op, and it basically looks like it could have been canceled back in 1998 and revived for this project. This also means Salamander III is the first new Gradius game since Gradius Re;Birth in 2008, also developed by M2. …Konami, why are you not allowing M2 to re-release the games they developed on collections that they are also developing? Bah. Why you gotta be so frustrating?

Gradius Origins will be released for PS5, Xbox Series, Switch, and PC via Steam on August 7th.

Another Story of Seasons Remake Announced!
(Except This One Actually Looks Good)

…Marvy, ma’am, this is the third bloody Story of Seasons game you remade in the past six years. You only put out one original game in that time, not counting the Doraemon crossovers. I get that these are easier to farm out (pun intended) to other studios. Friends of Mineral Town (2019) and A Wonderful Life (2023) were both made by Bullets Co., Ltd. of SaGa Frontier Remastered (2021) and Romancing SaGa: Minstrel Song Remastered (2022) fame. (Yeah! Bet you didn’t expect me to connect the dots like that, didja punk?) Hell, they didn’t even develop the latest original game, Pioneers of Olive Town (2021), as that was a Three Rings Inc joint. You know, the folks who made the 6/10 bangers Trinity Trigger (2023) and Farmagia (2024). I get that they think the series is big business after they inspired Stardew Valley (2016)— the best Story of Seasons game. However, this slapdash approach is just the wrong way to go about it.

This time, instead of going back to the golden age for the series, they are going back to the DS era with a remake of Harvest Moon DS: Grand Bazaar. Now, I understand that some people have loads of nostalgia for the console Story of Seasons games, but I always viewed the DS ones as being pretty middling. In part because they came out constantly, all blended together, and had to include DS as part of their names. Why not, I dunno, Musical Melody (2005)? That one got an 83 on Metacritic and was good enough to get ported to the Wii.

Anyway, Story of Seasons: Grand Bazaar is probably the best looking Story of Seasons game that isn’t a Doraemon spin-off. Character models are cute and detailed. The cel-shading on animals and people makes them pop next to the more textured environments, and the general color choices in the art direction are to my liking. All of which is a surprise, as I think the original Grand Bazaar looks like a nightmare manifest into life. I think the wind gliding mechanic, obviously listed from Breath of the Wild, is a cute way to make travel more dynamic. And think that the game captures the ideal modern look the series has been looking for since… 2019. Now, will it play the best? I have absolutely no clue!

Now, who is developing this? Well, Marvelous has a habit of hiding who their developers are until after release. So I cannot say, but it looks like they got a more capable developer handling the series, and I hope it actually meets whatever expectations or standards farming game fans have for it. Story of Seasons: Grand Bazaar will be released on August 27, 2025 for Switch and PC, because there just is not a proper audience on PS4/PS5, I guess.

Everybody’s Golf is Back, BAY-BEE!
(So is Hot Shots Golf, By Technicality!)

…Hold up a minute, this is the third Sony IP that is being licensed and brought to a Nintendo platform, published by Bandai Namco? (The first was Freedom Wars (2015).) Somebody must have a strong friendship with a Sony executive, or maybe they have a wife working at the other company.

Okay, okay, so back when Sony was throwing money around like crazy and trying to run the global games business like it was their destiny (it was), they started up their own golf game series. Called Everybody’s Golf around the world, except for America, where it was called Hot Shots Golf. The series was a reliable, decently popular, and overall quality golf game, developed by a studio basically founded to support this series, and one that delivered a golf game on every Sony console. …Until the PS5, probably because Sony of America now runs things, and they do not view golf games as worth investing in. Even though they could have easily had the best golf game in town. Mario Golf has not been good since the 3DS one, or maybe GameCube game if you want to be a jackass like that. While Tiger Woods tanked the PGA Tour series by being a pedophile, until 2K brought it back two years ago.

Point is, Sony is letting Bandai Namco make a new Everybody’s Golf game, Everybody’s Golf: Hot Shots. Developed by the folks behind Disney Tsum Tsum Festival (2019), Digimon Survive (2022), and the otome visual novel rhythm game Jack Jeanne (2021). Not really who I would imagine as being ideal for a golf game, but… this looks like the prettiest game in the series so far. They have the best grass color and textures! The characters have slightly tweaked but way more endearing proportions, ‘cos they looked freaking weird when they moved over to HD consoles. And the game also reprises what I think are staple features of the series, like cheating by having your ball move after it lands. Along with zany extra modes in case you want to play Better Golf instead of regular golf. Online and local multiplayer is back, of course, and while it seems to lack the free roam feature of the 2017 entry, I do not think that is a big deal. Golf just works better if you can teleport to your destination.

Now, I am not a golfer, I don’t like golf games, I took over 30 tries to get the ball in the hole at the Skokie Sports Park last summer. But I think this has the potential to be the best golf game in the past decade.

Everybody’s Golf: Hot Shots will be released for PS5, Switch, and PC via Steam sometime in 2025. Hopefully on the day GTA VI launches, as I think that’d just be funny.

Rhythm Heaven Groove Announced!
(Not Even Cancer Can Kill This!)

Rhythm Heaven is one of those series that I have a warped American perception of, as I just view it as something that never got many chances to succeed. The original GBA title launched in 2006 as a Japan exclusive. The Nintendo DS one came out in 2009, and did pretty darn well, as rented Beyoncé for an ad campaign. And that’s how you made money in 2008. But Rhythm Heaven Fever for the Wii came out in 2012 in North America, as a casual rhythm mini-game system when people wanted The New Nintendo. Then 2015’s Rhythm Heaven Megamix, a compilation title with a half a game’s worth of new rhythm games, was a more lowkey release that Nintendo took a year to localize.

However, the story of Rhythm Heaven is very different in Japan, and you can tell that just by looking at sales. Bouncing around, Megamix sold over a million units, but using this Japanese game sale database tool, over 70% of all Megamix sales were in Japan. Which makes sense, as while we here in The West view Rhythm Heaven as a zany Nintendo game, in Japan, it’s the brainchild of Tsunku. A hugely successful Japanese musician with a storied career… who lost his vocal cords to cancer about a decade ago. Yikes.

Because of this, it is easy to see how and why the series has been on ice for so long. Nobody would want to replace Tsunku. Nobody could replace him. And I can only imagine how, as a singer, losing his vocal cords crushed his world. It’s probably why Nintendo has avoided even re-releasing Rhythm Heaven Megamix on Switch. Because they would not want to do anything with it without asking Tsunku first.

With this in mind, it’s a lot more heartwarming to see Rhythm Heaven Groove be announced. A brand new Rhythm Heaven game, offering the same compelling rhythmic zaniness that the series is so known for. The trailer was mostly just a showcase of the concept of the game, reintroducing it to a new audience, but it still is great to see it come back.

Rhythm Heaven Groove will be released exclusively for Nintendo Switch in 2026.

Tomodachi Life 3: Livin’ Da Dream Announced
(For GTS Fans, It Is but a Dream)

I know I keep going on about the importance of when a game is released relative to its impact, but I think Tomodachi Life (2014) is a wonderful example of this. The game came out in the summer of 2014. New consoles were out, but jack shit was coming out for them, and after E3 2014, Q4 2014 looking drier than an Arizona Christmas. Except for Smash Bros. Nintendo fans were hungry for something, along with non-Nintendo direhards who wanted to play a quirky handheld game. Enter Tomodachi Life, a game where you pur friends and characters into it, made using Miis, and just watch ’em do wacky shit together. Though, it caught some flack for not supporting gay marriage, leading Nintendo to take one of their biggest L’s when they tried to answer why the game did not include gay relationships. Saying that they “never intended to make any form of social commentary with the launch of the game.” Yeah, because including gay relationships is social commentary, but not including them isn’t. Very sound logic. (For context, this was a year before the US legalized gay marriage nationwide.)

Despite this kickback, Tomodachi Life was a rousing success, selling 6.72 million units… most of which were in Japan. This made the decision to not make a sequel for Switch, and instead do a port of the far less successful Miitopia (2016) rather… questionable. Maybe they thought it would be redundant next to Animal Crossing? Regardless, they have announced a new, tropical, themed sequel, dubbed Tomodachi Life: Living the Dream. Sadly not Livin’ aa Dream, because this ain’t a Spike Lee joint with ghost confessions and shit!

Akumako: “You probably should actually watch a Spike Lee movie at some point.”

I probably should, but they won’t want to watch something like Malcolm X during movie night at The Shrine.

Anyway, not much was shown, but it’s Tomodachi Life. You make Miis of people, share them with your friends, and watch them do weird things while saying zany stuff using text-to-speech voices. Side note, but most games without the budget for VA work should just have TTS as an accessibility feature. It would make a lot of visual novels better, and TTS has evolved well past Microsoft Sam. Looking at you, Ren’py, ya little poop!

It all looks incredibly crisp and clean, rendering the Miis in a way faithful to their original incarnation, but with more detailed clothing, hair, and facial features, likely lifted from the Miitopia remaster. Though, in order to gauge how well it holds up, people will need to play it as a casual side game for a month or two, seeing just how many ideas and skits the game could possibly sift through. And we will need to wait a while, as Tomodachi Life: Living the Dream is hoping to be Tomodachi Life: Living the Dream (2026).

Ubisoft Opens Joint Subsidiary With Tencent
(It Contains All Their Biggest IPs)

Ubisoft once managed to avoid a hostile takeover by Viacom by delivering high-selling, highly regarded, video games. They were doing quite well. …But then Ghost Recon Breakpoint (2019) failed to meet expectations, and the ship began to sink.

I won’t recap the perils of modern Ubisoft, but even after delaying Assassin’s Creed Shadows and it doing quite well, all things considered, the company has too many problems, too much baggage, for it to carry on as it once did. They need help, they need funding, and they’re getting it from their 10% owner, Tencent, who is basically trying to become its 25% owner. They are doing this by creating a new jointly owned subsidiary, valued at $4.3 billion, where Tencent will own 25% in exchange for investing over a billion dollars. This subsidiary will include IPs like Assassin’s Creed, Far Cry, and Thomas L. Clancy, and studios located in Montréal, Quebec, Sherbrooke, Saguenay, Barcelona, and Sofia, among others. But who’s to say how long it will be until the subsidiary contains everything, or everything outside of this bucket is sold for yacht money?

Scumlord and ally of serial abusers the world over, Yves Guillemot, has done what a CEO does and try to frame a loss as a new opportunity, calling it a “historic agreement” and praising employees while ultimately selling them to new owners, not sharing a scrap of the billion dollars his company received for selling the IP they grew and helped flourish. This is the first step in what I believe will be a years-long process of turning the French Ubisoft into an international Chinese company, and that is worrying. It means the industry will be getting smaller. It means the already massive Chinese games industry will have more sway over what games get made. And Europe will be losing its biggest game publisher.

There was a time when I would view this as an awful, nasty thing. But then Trump got elected again, and I am becoming increasingly radical in my political viewpoints. Now I’m looking forward to China becoming the singular Global Superpower. …Not looking forward to needing to learn Chinese in 15 years though.

Reflecting on Zenless Zone Zero With 6/10 Beats
(My Backup Preamble if Animard Didn’t Go Live)

You really need to spend an hour listening to understand my point, as the first few tracks are among the best…

This past week, I learned that Zenless Zone Zero finally got an official soundtrack release at the tail-end of 2024. And it is a whopping 6.5 hours of music, spread across 198 tracks. Because 200 would have just been excessive. Over the past week, I listened to the soundtrack twice— as background music while working and writing— and my thoughts on it are… well, I kind of gave it away with the title of this section, didn’t I?

As a refresher, while I ultimately enjoyed my time with ZZZ when I put in 40 hours around launch, I was frustrated that the soundtrack did not go hard enough.

Video games, as a medium, are home to some of the best music. I genuinely think it is true and not a radical take. So many of my favorite songs and albums are ultimately video game soundtracks, and game music has this wonderful ability to build upon a scene. To really capture the feeling of a place, an encounter, a moment, and the opportunity to get a little funky with it. Unlike films of TV, video game soundtracks need to loop, shift, and be of a quality where players could happily listen to for hours at a time if need be. The people who were on the ground floor of video game music were often technological innovators, weird dorks who were often given carte blanche to do whatever they wanted, and delivered just an excess of variety. Game soundtracks span all genres, all types, and have done wonders to broaden my musical tastes over time.

As such, I have certain expectations that a game soundtrack should go hard, needs to have a palpable sense of personality, and not be afraid to play around with genre. Which is why I am more than a little miffed to realize, with the full OST in my hand, that ZZZ really does lack that. Its range is basically lo-fi jams to hip-hop backing beats to dubstep. Some are more diverse vocal tracks, but goldarn do so many of these songs just sound like the same thing I had been listening to for hours. And when it does shift things up, it’s for such a brief instance that it’s more jarring than anything.

The music is seldom, if ever, bad. It is all competently produced, sounds good, and makes for engaging enough background music, offering a sufficient mix of lull tracks and more intense ones, and the structure of the soundtrack also gets points for not being terrible. Seriously, so many game soundtracks are arranged wrongly. (For the record, the right way is chronological, at least 90% of the time.) The soundtrack is good at being what it wants to be. …But goldarn does it feel like it is missing something vital. I think vocals, regardless of the language, could do an incredible amount to elevate these tracks and completely transform the soundscape by adding a new dimension. I think that more diverse instrumentation and sounds— more electronica cues and ‘beats that scare the maidens/normies’— could do a lot to elevate the soundtrack and give it more texture. And while I commend the choice to include so much music, you gotta have some variety! It’s as if the creators did not have any more ideas beyond a narrow range. …Or, more likely, somebody from up high told them no, as they wanted the game to appeal to a mass market.

And that is what I think is ultimately my takeaway from revisiting ZZZ by listening to its (at one point complete) OST for the first time. It sounds like it was made by people who had to restrain themselves to fit a corporate mandated brand image. Which I think is just a bad call. Genshin Impact has a beautiful soundtrack that captures what it wants to be to a tee. Dragalia Lost had a soundtrack mostly consisting of repurposed pop music, but that gave it oodles of personality, and its original tracks all went hard. From its boss battle themes, to its lowkey banger battle royale theme, to its delightful story tracks. Variety is a key part of a good soundtrack, and good album. Otherwise, it just sounds like looping through the same collection of sounds. I just do not think that ZZZ has, or was able to have, that. Which really pisses me off.

I want to love this game’s soundtrack, and keep it around as something that I can just pop on, because it is so expansive and so geared for background music. Instead, I’m just left with this sense that ‘this should’ve been better’ as the next generic-flavored track comes one. Why would I listen to that when I can listen to… any of the other albums in my library? When I could listen to, say, royalty-free Japanese music, or those Space Pirate Mito soundtracks that Cassie and I preserved a year ago. I want to listen to music that makes me FEEL! And ZZZ‘s soundtrack… has a few tracks that make me FEEL, but that’s, at best, 20% of the package.

Progress Report 2025-03-30

Yeah, you aren’t getting dinny bupkis outta me after I delivered that 14,000 words of stuff. Just accept this Animard panel, go home, and be a housewife.

2025-03-23: Got 1,300 words into the Rundown before getting pulled into the work mines again. Yay!

2025-03-24: Wrote like 750 words during a mandatory break, and nothing else. Fuck this shit!

2025-03-25: Wrote 2,100 words for the Rundown, as the work stopped coming in at, like, 18:00 today. I dunno why.

2025-03-26: Another basically 12 hour day, though an hour was spent doing ‘personal stuff’ like dishes and tax stuff for my sister. Wrote 900 word ZZZ section, and the 150 word opening for the Nintendo Direct section. Then I grabbed header and preamble images.

2025-03-27: 8,400 cot dang words written about Nina Tendo’s juicy peaches, and that one Ubisoft bit.

2025-03-28: Edited this fish and sent her to the fryer! Fry ’em up, don’t give a fuck, ‘cos you’re gonna go die and become a duck! QUACK!

2025-03-29: Started on TSF Showcase 2025-04, getting 500 words into it before stopping, as I had a headache from static-y background noise audio that a client subjected me to for work. So I decided to play the demo for The Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy. …And modern demos for games are like 5 hours long for some reason! I like the story and characters so far, but the strategy battles have not sold me yet. I have a feeling things will change as I get a full party. The intro is kinda slapdash in a weird way. And the board game exploration kinda sucks ass, as it encourages save scumming after every move. Still, gonna pre-order it, because I want Too Kyo Games to succeed.. Meaning next month I will buy that and All in Abyss. Big money! Also, I am actually getting paid this month, and I’m getting an extra 2% of the company for my hard work. Meaning I will get more of the share when my boss sells the practice in 2-3 years.

This Post Has 4 Comments

Charishal 04/04/2025 Reply

Thanks for the post Natalie! And thanks for your review of Gamefighter Animard!
I think the reason it is published left to right comes from its video game inspiration. Not only are the speech bubbles meant to be read left to right, the text within them is written horizontally as well (as opposed to the standard vertical display in manga). This mirrors many Japanese games (notably JRPGs) where text is displayed the same way. Maybe this was originally done to make it easier to port these console games internationally.
Nagai’s style is also really visually entertaining. You never know if you’ll get a bunch of chibi characters goofing around or a nightmare-inducing hellscape when you turn a page.
Looks like there’s quite a few Nintendo announcements these past weeks. The Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons/Rune Factory games always capture my interest when I see them. Though I’ve never stated them since always scared of the time I would need to invest to get into these games.
1. Natalie Neumann 04/04/2025 Reply
  
  I always thought that the left to right display of text was a quirk of how early computers worked. One of the first things computer did was display text, and they were initially made to display English text, so they were made to be read from left to right. When it came time to make computers that displayed Japanese characters, this was just carried over, became a standard, and when game consoles were made, this rule just stuck. Not because it was impossible, but because it was easier. At least, that’s my observational theory.
  It’s definitely fair to be cautious of run-times in games like that. Some people can hoof it can clear it in 30-40 hours, but you can also spend upwards of 100 hours in it if you are dedicated.
Ouran Nakagawa 04/11/2025 Reply

oh my god I’m catching up to some Natalie news and this is fucking epic! A third Somnium Files game?!?? 😭 i gotta finish the second lol
~~hopefully we get a serial killer who uses a TSF method again~~
1. Natalie Neumann 04/12/2025 Reply
  
  I doubt it will be a serial killer again, based on the story outlined so far. Though, the Steam store page for the game does contain a suspicious looking person-sized pod. So who knows!

Rundown Preamble Ramble:Game Fighter Animard is Dope!

Geoff Keighley Launches The Game Business(Because Why Not At This Point?)

Game Informer is BACK, BAY-BEE!(Fuck You, GME! We Got That Crypto Money!)

The FINAL Switch 1 Nintendo Direct(Nina Tendo Works in Mysterious Ways…)

Re-Release The Whole Saga of SaGa!(SaGa Frontier 2 Remastered Shadow Dropped)

Monument Valley Trilogy is Coming to Switch(They Are Now REAL Games!)

Raidou Remastered: The Mystery of the Soulless Army Announced(And it Is a Damn Remake!)

Patapon 1+2 Replay Announced(Patapon Is BACK… On A Nintendo Console?)

AI: The Somnium Files 3 – No Sleep For Kaname Date Announced(A Sequel To One Of My Favorite Games Ever!)

Gradius Origins Announced(All Praise to the REAL Shooting Games, Ya Schmucks!)

Another Story of Seasons Remake Announced!(Except This One Actually Looks Good)

Everybody’s Golf is Back, BAY-BEE!(So is Hot Shots Golf, By Technicality!)

Rhythm Heaven Groove Announced!(Not Even Cancer Can Kill This!)

Tomodachi Life 3: Livin’ Da Dream Announced(For GTS Fans, It Is but a Dream)

Ubisoft Opens Joint Subsidiary With Tencent(It Contains All Their Biggest IPs)

Reflecting on Zenless Zone Zero With 6/10 Beats(My Backup Preamble if Animard Didn’t Go Live)