Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night Review

From the dusk-basked Symphony, the lingering Circle in the sky receded.  Harmony was soon established, giving away to a brilliant Aria that accompanied the Dawn.  Yet upon establishing this new world in a glorious Portrait and bringing Order to the wilds, it all abruptly receded into Shadow, where it languished only to be brought back to life through a most unprecedented Ritual.

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Shantae: Half-Genie Hero Review

253840_20161210141444_1After over three years of development and total crowdfunded proceeds of nearly one million dollars, Shantae: Half-Genie Hero has finally been released, and I was one of the few thousand people to have backed the project. As such, I’m actually able to release a game review the day it comes out, which will likely never happen again. (more…)

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Cat Girl Without Salad ~Amuse-Bouche~ Review

tumblr_mkk7p3JzsE1qeldg8o1_1280Cat Girl Without Salad originated as an “April Fools joke” back in 2013, with developer WayForward claiming the game will be every genre under the sun, and come out for every system possible in fall of that year. That didn’t happen, and the game’s announcement, despite being supposedly real according to WayForward staff, was largely dismissed as a simple joke. Over three years later though, the project was announced on the tumblr of the lead artist and was released exclusively through the Humble Monthly Bundle for June 2016. Was this oddball little curiosity something worth waiting so many years for? Eh… Kind of. (more…)

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A Boy and His Blob Review

20160521100132_1This year has not been marvelous in regards to the games I’ve played. Most have been pretty average so, far, which is unfortunate since I try to curate my list of games to play to contain games that are generally well received. I enjoy being able to deconstruct elements of a game and articulate what exactly I dislike about them, but I’d rather be releasing relentless praise upon games, joyful that I had the opportunity to play them. …Unfortunately, I can’t do that here. (more…)

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Rundown (8/16-8/22) Forever A Failure

  • Post category:Rundowns
  • Reading time:8 mins read
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0 DR nothing zero zip zada failure no more motivation give up surrenderAnother week, another one-fifth-second of a year gone down the drain, and another series of days where I feel like I have been a worthless POS, as I am not keeping my shit organized well enough. I’ll hopefully get better once I return to a school based schedule this week, and hopefully my first semester of full-time college does not cause me to dive down the despair drenched drain to the dirty and dingy darkness. Alliteration is fun… (more…)

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Shantae and the Pirate’s Curse Review

maxresdefaultPart of me wonders if I have simply become too bitter towards games over the three years I’ve been reviewing them. I truly do want to see the good in all games, but my mind is so fixated on the negatives that I end up seeing so many titles I was genuinely interested in and more than willing to love as simply okay. Even if I am positive towards a game, I often wonder if I was too positive, and gave an opinion that was not accurate to how I truly felt about it. Plus, whenever I go against the general consensus of a game, I can’t help but wonder if I am wrong for holding such an opinion, and perhaps expressed it far too negatively. Anyhow, here’s a review of a stealth released PC port of a sequel to a game that I honestly struggle to determine whether or not I think is all that good. (more…)

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Shantae: Risky’s Revenge – Director’s Cut Review

ss_99f043b98f7745b01de71c575e8c6030d7ba7df9.600x338Sorry this review took so long to come out, I was distracted by the title I have on the docket for my review after this, and it is a 100+ hour RPG that I assumed was about 50. Also, I have been working full time over the past few weeks, and that has cut down on my game playing time as a result. Regardless, time to talk about a game I adored back when I played it on 3DS. (more…)

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Ducktales Remastered


Let me get this straight, brain. You wish to play a game that is a remake of one you’ve never previously played… on a system far older than you… based on a show that ended about four years before you were born. Well Steam Sales are a nice thing that encourages my wallet to ejaculate money, and for $5 I figured the critically acclaimed, I think, Ducktales Remastered would be worth the price. The quick verdict? Well, yeah, I guess. (more…)

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Rundown (6/01-6/08) E3… and Butts… I’m Tired!

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  • Reading time:7 mins read
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VO Check out my butt in the bathWell, it’s that time of year again, where the sun rises high and slowly creeps over to the other side of the country where magic truly does exist in the form of a corporate PR event that will be jam packed with ice cream pandas and lobster men who will undoubtedly be shot by a bunch of hired apathetic day workers… Sorry, I hit my head again and those words came out. Point it, it is Pre-E3, or Preeee! as one may call it if they started a blog post about video game news by insinuating the sun creates lobster men. And as expected, everybody’s gushing to get their big thing in every lady’s face before the oversaturated extravaganza hits when I’m at work… guess I better get the skeleton ready for me to pin flesh onto it! (more…)

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Rundown (3/27-3/31) Miniature Space Horses To The Sexy Pickle

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Rundown of Seduction

Crap, I didn’t plan ahead an April Fools idea! Damn you Spring Break, and your encouragement to dates being a distilled unreality! Now I’ve got to post the handful of stories I felt like talking about in the shortest Rundown/NWS yet. I blame the PAX for leaving me with just 6 topics! And GDC for not being reported on due to a plethora of presentations as the core focus.


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Rundown (3/17-3/22): Female’s Lazy HD Instinct of Schizophrenia With Murlin Deryl and Ieyasu

  • Post category:Rundowns
  • Reading time:18 mins read


Hey, I’m posting this ahead of schedule, because I plan on squealing over PAX East when it ends, where I’ll pretty much link to Destructoid’s coverage while typing out words of happy and cynicism. But some stuff happened before that, so I’ll just talk about that. Also, new title because I realized that I’ll just use this format for events as well.


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Adventure Time: Hey Ice King! Why’d You Steal Our Garbage?! Review

I’ll admit to being extremely cynical of this being a thing. I mean, WayForward, a developer who is very good at what they do, even if the end product can be a little light on content. Working on a game based on Adventure Time, one of my favorite shows of all time. With the subtitle of “Hey Ice King! Why’d You Steal Our Garbage?!” Sounded, at least to me, like it was something that could easily end up becoming something that was trying way too hard in being an “accurate” adaptation of the game. And I can safely say that is not the case by a long short.

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Aliens Infestation Review


I like WayForward, even though their games tend to be fairly hit or miss in my eyes.  And I enjoyed both Alien and Aliens, even though it has been years since I have seen them, due to how I only watch films quarterly, if that. So their merger was not something that’d set my world ablaze, but seeing as Halloween is coming up, I have it unplayed on my shelf, and this is the second closest thing I’ve played to a horror game, let’s dive on in!

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