This Week’s Topic:
- Natalie got bottom surgery and spent a few days at the hospital
Rundown Preamble Ramble:
Natalie Recites the Header Image Because Why Not?
Word up, Natalie.TF readers, it’s yo girl Nattie! After 6.5 years into my transition, I finally got the courage, coverage, and cash to go in for bottom surgery. It wasn’t the ‘full package.’ Just a plain old zero-depth vaginoplasty. Meaning a lotta my bits changed.
Clitoris? I got that shit!
Dat V? Ish be swole as hell, but I’m still rockin’ it!
Balls, scrotes, testicles, and all that shit? TRASHED!
Urethra? Relocated, ‘cos girls gotta pee low and piss it loud!
Vaginal canal (the part dicks go into)? Bruh, what do ya think zero-depth means? Ain’t nobody penetratin’ this ace-ass bitch!
INTERSEX STATE ACHIEVED! (According to BCBS of IL). Boy functions be terminated for real and forevers, and all I gotta do is some lame-ass paperwork to get press F on all’a my shit. …Not that F. The Femme kind.
Header image is from Sex Change Diary by Tsukiyomin & Tsukiyono Marron. It’s some old primo Boomer shit. ‘Problematic’ as fuck, but in the way ya’ll can fuck with!
PEACE!!! …And Merry Christmas!
Hospital in Review
(Natalie Rambles About Her Hospital Stay)
Not much bubbled up on my radar this past week, so let me take this opportunity to review my stay at the hospital.
The surgery prep was its own breed of discomfort due to the whole liquid diet thing. This meant I was overhydrated, peeing from my butt, hungry, and had low energy in general. It was not the best state to enter into something as intense as this, but it was necessary.
The first day was the worst day, as all I did was lay back, suck on ice, and go through tests every hour. I was locked in this awkward drifting state and I wanted little more than to drink water, eat eggs, and sleep for 3 uninterrupted hours.
By the time I reached Tuesday morning, I was finally able to eat and drink again and got my first taste of the coveted hospital food and… it was okay. A lot of options were available, ingredients seemed simple, and there was a salt packet with every meal if I felt the food needed extra flavor. Portions were well sized for my liking but I gradually realized that I really should only order two things from the menu. While food is vital to recovery, my appetite was not what it normally was…
Physical therapy also began on Tuesday, and it mostly centered around how to get out of bed, use the toilet, and walk down the halls. Well, that and whatever exercises I could do while in my bed. Mostly just breathing, foot and leg stretches. Getting out of bed is still a bit tricky, as I need to roll to my side and then plant my feet on the ground, using the bed frame to push myself up, but I could do it myself without these compression pads around my legs. I know they prevent blood clots, but I would rather not have them, just so that I could get up on my own.
As for the care, my nurses were very nice, but I kept getting confused who was who. They changed everyday, and the majority of them were short, skinny, White women, so it was easy to mistake one for another. There were also some slight care differences between them. Some insisted on cleaning my butt after using the bathroom, some used wipes and a cleaning fluid, while others expected me to do it. Let’s just say it was a bit confusing to me…
Sleeping was also a big issue for me, as I spent most of my days in bed and when doing that, it is hard to convince your body to shut down and adapt to a new mode. As such, I felt drowsy most of my time at the hospital, and was nowhere near as productive as I wanted to be.
Another thing that perpetually annoyed me about my stay was the hospital table next to my bed. As a wheeled table, it should have been easy to move, but it just refused to get into the right place. It has to do with the wheels under the bed clashing with those of the table, and I needed that table if I wanted to eat food or use my computer. Or rather iPad. Ihe crappy $60 laptop I brought with did not work particularly well, so I switched to a tablet instead.
It seemed like a bit of a waste after I got everything ready and loaded 12 albums on that thing, but the most wasteful thing was the hospital‘s use of plastics. With modern environmental awareness being what it is, I try to be cautious about how things are packaged and how much waste is produced. And my goodness are hospitals BAD when it comes to throwing away plastics. Every saline solution, IV, pill bag, plastic water cup, they all go into the trash, and I produced a full bag for the first two days, easily!
This is not a good thing, but it is also kind of necessary. In the world of healthcare, you do not want to reuse supplies and items without thoroughly disinfecting them. Otherwise, the disease spreads and more people get sick. Hell, recycling medical supplies is literally how AIDS spread past one dude…!
…Oh, wait. I probably should be talking about the surgery site. It was bandaged for 2 days and when it was unveiled via a painful pulling, I was shocked. After so many years, my crotch is flat. No more penis, no more balls, and no more anti-androgen. I finally reached the place I wanted to be for so long, and while none of it might be ideal, I feel as if a burden had finally been lifted off my shoulders.
Now I just need to wait a TBD amount of time and finally get back home where I can do the things I like doing! But now with a spiffy new swollen part!