I Was An Old Man At Death’s Door And Then I Got Shifted Into A Young Japanese Girl

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TSF Showcase 2024-32
The Great Shift: Kiyomi’s Tale by Mariko

After going through the first few stories written in Morpheus’s The Great Shift open universe last week, I was left… underwhelmed. Despite clearly having ideas and intent, the creators consistently did not follow through with these ideas and when they did… they had some less savory implications. However, I did not feel that was the best way to showcase the concept of The Great Shift, and I wanted to find some early gem I could point to and… I think I found one. A 15,000 word story, from 1999, from a creator who wrote 3 lengthy stories, then disappeared into the night. And it’s… actually pretty good. A teensy creepy, a bit simplistic, but it actually has some personality and conviction!

Kiyomi’s Tale begins, like most Great Shift stories, with the protagonist being stripped from their ordinary life, into another, and finds themself in a world of confusion and chaos. With the protagonist being the 97-year-old Olaf Gunderson, who winds up in the body of a 12-year-old Japanese girl named Kiyomi Hasegawa. Making this an example of the niche of TSF stories that see old men become little girls as they are given a second chance in life.

It’s a transformation archetype that I don’t think I’ve really covered before, but is pretty self-explanatory. It’s a story about someone being given a second chance, effectively being reborn in a different body, and being given the opportunity to mix and match what parts of their old life with their new life. From continuing to be a stubborn old-ass bastard even as a kid, to more or less accepting a new identity, just happy to still be alive. And this is firmly an example of the latter.

Anyway, the story proper begins with an efficient trickle of information, provided as Olaf comes to terms with the fact that he’s no longer in his retirement home, and isn’t a derelict old man. He sees a car wrapped around a tree, hears the sound of chaos, has a brief flashback to his time in The Great War, slowly looks down at his body, young, thin, small, with taut, darker skin. And displays a bit of casual anti-Japanese racism, because this man was born no later than 1900.

It presents Olaf’s personality and mindset through short snippets. It offers some greater exposition so even a reader unfamiliar with The Great Shift gets what’s going on. And it allows Olaf to decompress over this situation, sitting and observing, in a way that’s fitting for someone who couldn’t do much of anything by himself for so many years. Also fitting is how he immediately pisses his denim skort (skirt/shorts hybrid) after patting his flat crotch. Because once people become 90, their bladder control just disappears.

Following this deluge of detail, things really get started when the rest of the cast show up. Including a college student named Brendan, now in the body of a 6-year-old Black girl, whose body was wrecked in a nearby car crash. And a group of Kiyomi’s school friends who got their bodies scattered amongst themselves. With this being a worldwide SNAFU, they are all quick to share information, their background and muse over what this means for society as a whole, as anyone would do after a situation like this.

Rather than stick around, the school friends roller skate off— it’s the 90s after all— leaving Olaf and Brendan on their own. Still lost in a daze over what happened, they quickly latch onto each other, as… they really have nobody else around them, and it’s easy to trust someone who looks like a cute little girl. With his 97 years of life behind him, Olaf is more calm in the face of uncertainty, and optimistic about all of this as he can walk and isn’t wracked in constant pain. While Brendan is far more frazzled, unnerved by how small and frail he is now, yet still understanding how much worse it could be for him.

It’s a good bit of character building, enhanced by the delightful little excursions of Olaf digging through the bloody car crash that killed Brendan’s original body and the two getting snacks at the local convenience store. Both acknowledging the grisly reality of the Shift, and allowing the characters to relish in the simple joy of being kids, eating ice cream on a hot sunny day.

After spending… several hours like this, the duo of Olaf and Brendan are redirected to the Hasegawa household, which is where I need to pause and address the biggest problem with this story. Its cast is huge, some characters change names throughout it, and every notable character swapped bodies with someone, making things wicked confusing.

The simple version is that the Hasegawa’s all got shifted in some way. They all got younger or stayed pretty much the same age, which is pretty ideal for the Shift. While the mother and father are still a woman and man respectively, which is pretty uncharacteristic for the Shift. 

After using the household’s phone to make some calls, Olaf learns that his son committed suicide after seeing how messed up his family was. Brendan’s parents are either MIA or too old to help out. And with the Hasegawa’s being an upstanding Japanese American family, written by a— probably White— writer who goes by Mariko, they are open to helping out Olaf and Brendan. They like them so much that they insist Olaf go by Kyomi— the original name of his current body— and Brendan go by the name of Noriko— the name of the Hasegawa grandmother, who now goes by Noboyuki.

If this is getting confusing for you— and it definitely was for me— don’t worry, I made a list detailing who is who:

• Olaf Gunderson (now Kiyomi) – Norwegian 97 y/o man, has the body of 12 y/o Japanese girl, Kiyomi.
• Hiroki Hasagawa – 40 y/o Japanese father, has the body of 12 y/o Black boy, Jason.
• Natsumi Hasegawa – 38 y/o Japanese mother, has the body of 22 y/o Irish ginger redhead woman.
• Hikaru Haseawa – 13 y/o Japanese son, has the body of 10 y/o Chinese girl. 
• Kiyomi (now Makato) – 12 y/o Japanese daughter, has the body of 13 y/o Japanese brother, Hikaru.
• Noriko (now Noboyuki) – 65 y/o Japanese grandma, has the body of her 40 y/o Japanese son, Hiroki.
• Jason – 12 y/o Black boy, has the body of another 12 y/o Black boy, Jeremy.
• Jeremy (now Jennifer) – 12 y/o Black boy, has the body of White blonde 12 y/o girl, Susan Krustenjerna.
• Brendan Lawrence (now Noriko) – 19 y/o college student, has the body of a 6 y/o Black girl.

I might be stretching in reading ‘dark-skinned’ as meaning Black— they could just mean Desi— but in the 90s, that’s usually what that term meant. Also, this story definitely gets points for diversity, which I really would not expect from… anything on 90s Fictionmania? Race change is something that just does not show up in most of TSF Showcases, because it just does not show up in a lot of TSF media. There are reasons why, but it basically boils down to people being cowards, racists, or racism-tolerant. Mariko though? She’s straight legit.

So are the Hasegawas, who are not only open to helping out Kiyomi (formerly Olaf) and Noriko (formerly Brendan), but they basically want to adopt them, after only knowing them for a day. Kiyomi and Noriko are a bit apprehensive of this, yet with nowhere else to go, they could really use the support of a loving family. And the Hasegawas also think the two should really go back to school, specifically resuming where the original Kiyomi (now Makoto) left off, in seventh grade.

Kiyomi might have had a lot of experience as an adult, but they dropped out of high school in the 1910s and were retired for 30+ years. They’re, on average, about as smart as a 12-year-old. While Noriko needs to… “develop socially.” Which I think means adapting to being in a new body and possibly developing the confidence to attend college. After all, people have just ruined their time at college for reasons less plausible than being turned into a 6-year-old. 

Natsumi Hasegawa also insists that they both call her mom or mother, because she always wanted a bigger family, and does not think it is right to see her daughter call her Mrs. Hasegawa. There is something to be said about how pushy she is with these two on the matter, and her later behavior only adds to that, but she is never presented as a controlling figure. Just one who is possibly a bit too protective and invested in maintaining order. Which, as a mother of two, possibly emboldened by a regained youth and taller stature, does make sense. She’s just coping with things in her own way.

This agreement is followed by a bathing scene involving Kiyomi, Noriko, and Hikaru Hasegawa— the 13-year-old brother of the family, now in the body of a 10-year-old Chinese girl. A scene that Kiyomi describes as “[feeling] a bit like child pornography, I guess.” Which it could be framed as, though it’s clearly meant to be more innocent. It is meant to capture ‘the Japanese bathing experience,’ the social act of communal bathing as a child, and give the girl-ified members of the Hasegawa family an opportunity to examine their bodies. They don’t do anything lewd here, it’s just them accepting the reality they’ve been dealt, soaking, and decompressing. All as they talk about their new bodies, wondering how they will develop and grow out over the years, and internalizing themselves as girls.

This is continued with… basically the entire story from this point. 

There are no chapter breaks, but the story is broken down into smaller episodes showing Kiyomi, her new siblings, and her new school friends. All of whom are basically undergoing their own form of gradual-yet-rapid acceptance of their new bodies and new life situations. Noriko’s resistance to this and insistence that they are not a girl gradually fades as they are doted on more by their newly appointed mother. Makoto is reluctant about being in their brother’s body at first, yet through her mother’s insistence and friendship with Jason, they swiftly adopt the mannerisms of a junior high boy. Jennifer, formerly Jeremy, has an outward dislike of being a girl initially, yet after being nudged into acting and dressing like one by their mother— and Natsumi— they start to realize that they like it.

It does not feel jarring— the characters actually acknowledge that they feel this way and how quickly they adapt— though it never overtly addresses why they do feel this way, or why they don’t resist it. With Kiyomi, it makes sense, as she had nothing left as Olaf, and after being pushed into this body, she doesn’t feel like putting up the fight to retain her masculinity. She’s willing to give this whole ‘being a girl’ thing a shot. Noriko… is just constantly treated as a little girl by those around her, so she just sort of goes with it.

Yet for characters like Hikaru, Jennifer, and Makoto, the justification is a bit looser. Makoto objects to losing his former bedroom, yet takes to the role of a boy and big brother like a fish to water, despite having been a girly girl just a few days ago. Hikaru is less receptive to feminine things as far as I can tell, distancing themself from their friends and going along with feminine things because of their mother’s requests. Though that’s partially because Hikaru is never a major character. And Jennifer… is enticed by the idea of Jason, who is in her original body, having a crush on her. 

None of these conclusions are wrong, though it does feel as if there is a lack of proper detail as to why they feel this way. That very well may be intentional, as the characters are indeed young and might not understand why they do these things, and might be adapting their personalities around external factors. Kids are easy to influence. Some are stubborn as heck, while others will change their outlook with enough external feedback, and… I think that’s an interesting idea. That the children, with developing plastic-sponge-like minds, might be more adaptable to a body swap than a working age adult.

…Or maybe everybody just adapts quickly in this story, as people get organized very fast.

The day after the Shift, people are already getting down to the local sports stadium to conduct a clothing swap meet, complete with concession vendors. McDonald’s McMoe’s is even open. On the fifth day after the shift, funerals are already being held for people who lost their lives, letting Kiyomi meet up with her granddaughter, Faith, now in the body of a 10-year-old Mediterranean girl. Who is basically her only remaining family. Then, a mere week after the Shift, the merry band of Kiyomi, Noriko, Makoto, Hikaru, Jason, Jennifer, and Faith are all heading to J.C. Long’s Junior High to attend the seventh grade together. 

It really shows a lot of faith in the structure of society to think that things can be remedied that quickly. It’s an optimism that you can only really find in works written before the pandemic, before people realized just how complex society is and how one industry failing to function can wreck everything.

However, this return to normalcy is ultimately part of the fantasy this story is trying to sell. One about being reborn as a young Japanese American girl with a big loving family and doting friends. Complete with a mother who insists on maintaining order. A determined father, committed to resuming work and carrying out business even in the face of disaster. And a level of comfortable affluence— enough to own a freshly renovated home with at least four bedrooms.

A fantasy where the world has changed, and many people either lost their lives or are living in pain. But those who survived are moving on, growing, adapting, becoming stronger, and becoming members of a more open minded society. It is naive. Its fixation on maintaining the ‘social harmony’ by having characters adapt their lives around their new bodies harkens back to a simpler, more impressionable, era. Yet it remains wholly earnest in its pursuit of this fantasy and does a good job of bringing it to fruition.

It’s definitely not the most sophisticated or detailed execution of the broad concept of The Great Shift. However, the story does what it does surprisingly well for a piece of late 90s internet fiction, telling a sweet narrative of acceptance and new beginnings that manages to avoid the creepier pitfalls of many age-regression-to-childhood stories. It might not be the most exemplary work for me to push The Great Shift as a fascinating concept. However, I think it’s the best that this ‘open universe’ had to offer in its first year.